


Moving Forward

by Ulmban



Category: Oxenfree (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Happy Ending, Fix-It, Ghosts, I am here to break peoples hearts, I die like a man, Sorry Not Sorry, Time Travel, alone-probably in a hole somewhere, i may or may not cry while writing this, including my own, lots of pain, no rough drafts, slight mentions of suicide later on, we'll see
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-16 09:20:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 41,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28579623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ulmban/pseuds/Ulmban
Summary: Alex sacrifices herself for her friends. Her friends aren't happy with that, but what can they do. They will be safe and that is good enough for Alex. staring down ghosts that want to wear your body like a glove is little less intimidating if you can beat them at their own game. But what happens when someone finds a way to fight back, what happens when they believe they can change fate. Alex may have sacrificed herself for her friends, but they refuse to sacrifice her.
Relationships: Alex & Jonas (Oxenfree), Clarissa & Jonas (Oxenfree), Clarissa & Nona (Oxenfree), Nona/Ren (Oxenfree)
Comments: 27
Kudos: 18





	1. Prolouge: Sacrifice

**Author's Note:**

> This is really my first fic that i am writing. I want to try my hand at fanfiction and write some of these story ideas that i have had in my head. Please tell me what you think. if no one wants to read it i probably wont write it, i am really just trying to gage possible interest before i really commit to this story. I hope you enjoy!
> 
> Disclaimer: all characters, except for my oc's, belong to night school studio who made the game.

Alex looked up at the glowing triangle above her, the absolute pain in the rear triangle that is going to haunt her dreams for the rest of her life, if she has a life after this that is. The ghosts are yelling at her to sacrifice Clarissa, to save herself. But she just couldn’t. Tuning the radio in was easy, she almost didn't hear the ghosts yelling at her in Clarissa’s voice, telling her that she was going to die, over and over that she will be trapped with them forever. 

“It's worth it.” The words did little to comfort herself so she thought about Jonas and Ren, Nona and even Clarissa. They would be free, they would be free from this hole of misery, if they were still alive. Alex took a deep breath and began to turn the dial to her radio, she started this she would end it. She turned the dial and one of the little triangles began to shake and split apart with a hum sounding in this underwater void she was in. 

“Oh! Getting started already, okay, you wanna play chicken with the “void”, fine. We can see how long you stay on the throttle.” 

“Shut up,” the fear coiling around her heart made the words catch in her throat as she tried to act brave, tried to be brave; but the water, the figures surrounding her that were not quite there, made it very difficult to do so. She turned the dial again shattering another little triangle.

“Alexandra, wake up. This course of action will only save those morons not yourself.”

They sounded desperate, the tears began to flow down her face as she thought about her friends, her mom, she thought about her and Jonas's conversation in the woods earlier. She promised him they would get to live together that they would get off this island.

“Don’t you understand. This isn’t the road you want to be on”

The ghosts were scared, so was she. Alex took one last look through the gate above her before turning the dial once more. The final triangle began to shake violently. And then shattered.

“Wait!” the ghosts plea went unanswered as the gate above them shrunk and then snapped close. Alex let the tears fall freely down her face. A flash. 

Alex was standing on the opposite side of a river from her friends, the forest and ground was lit a dull red around them. Her friends' eyes glowed that vibrant terrifying red before the world glitched around her and they were normal. They would be okay. The world glitched once more and her friends vanished leaving her alone in the strange violent forest before her world glitched once more.

It was dark, and empty. A black soulless void surrounded Alex as the ghosts began to speak again. They sounded remorseful almost

“Poor. Girl.”

“Yeah well, I’ve had enough of life honestly.” that wasn't true, Alex wanted to live. She so desperately wanted to live. But she wouldn't be able to live with herself if she abandoned someone else here. Even Clarissa. But she didn't think she could say that without breaking down. The world once again began to glitch and shift around her and she felt the darkness in her throat as the world seemed to collapse inward. She closed her eyes and let the darkness take her.

O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O

Jonas sat up like a rocket and immediately regretted it when his head felt like it was going to explode. The sunlight burned its way through his eyelids, the sound of the wind and boat seemed far too loud in his ears. He sunk back down onto the bench beneath him holding his head in his hands as he tried to collect himself. He then stiffened, the boat, yeah he was on the boat, but what happened how did he---the cave. Alex. Jonas’s eyes shot open and he leaped onto his feet ignoring the raging headache he had and looked around. He saw Ren and Nona and Clarissa, but no Alex. Fighting the fear settling in his stomach he stumbled over to where Nona and Ren were leaning against the railing and each other. He tried to shake Ren awake.

“Ughhh.” Ren slowly sat up waking Nona up in the process, she quietly curled into herself against the railing likely nursing a similar headache. “Like, dude i am never eating another brownie again.” Ren had his head in his hands and his eyes squeezed shut. “Like seriously, this is like a hangover times ten.” Ren finally opened his eyes and squinted at Jonas. “Hey buddy, you look well.” Jonas didn’t respond to Ren’s comment but just rolled his eyes. “So uh, where’s Alex?”

Jonas felt the lead weight in his stomach grow heavier at Ren’s question. “I don’t know, I was hoping you could tell me.” Ren’s face fell and grew pale as he stammered.

“B-but you went down into the hole with her, shouldn’t you know. I - I mean you were with her, weren't you? or did I dream that part?”

“Yeah, yeah I was with her,” Jonas rubbed the back of his head. This stupid headache. “At least for a little bit.” Ren’s eyebrows shot up

“What is that supposed to mean?”

Jonas sighed as he thought back to climbing into the bunker. Why did it feel like forever ago. Jonas noticed Nona watching him intently with concern and fear written all over her face “We climbed down the ladder and we got in the bunker. There was one of those tape player things just sitting there and it started to play a song.” Jonas winced as he thought back, “I thought I heard my mom.”

“You what!?” Ren’s voice aggravated Jonas’s headache and the pain flared up inside his skull.

“Shut up Ren.” Nona’s voice sounded strained and weak as she spoke. “Let him finish then you can ask questions.”

Jonas sighed, again. “We took a look at the tape player and it started to break so Alex tried winding it back up and there was a flash and-” Jonas stopped as he remembered what happened. “I saw my mom.” at Ren’s shocked expression he elaborated. “Not like I died and went to heaven, but like a memory. Just a memory.” Jonas rubbed his head again. “After that I woke up here and saw you guys.”

“Could you guys be any louder?” Jonas spun to look over at Clarissa and immediately regretted it as his head ache flared up again. It was like his skull was taking a sick joy in causing him pain right now.

“Clarissa!” Nona’s shout did not help the headache. Clarissa looked up at the three of them as she moved to stand up, then she faltered, her face falling and shoulders drooping as she aborted her attempt to stand up and leaned herself back against the railing. She looked horrible. Nona kneeled by Clarissa’s side as she stared away from the three of them looking over the sea. Was she crying? “Clarissa?” Nona’s voice brought Clarissa’s attention back to the three of them, and yep those were tears in Clarissa's eyes. “Clarissa what's wrong?” Nona’s voice had a hint of worry and fear to it now as Clarissa didn't respond. It was silent for a few more moments, Jonas wasn't sure if he or Ren were breathing at this point.

“She saved us.” the lead weight in Jonas stomach dropped and he felt it drag his heart into his shoes. 

“What happened?” Nona’s voice was gentle as the tears began to roll down Clarissa’s face.

“Alex, she- she saved us, saved me.” Clarissa’s voice was thick with emotion as she talked. “Alex, she came into the cave alone, the ghosts were tossing me around like a string puppet. They threatened her and told her that whatever she was planning wasn’t going to work, that others had already tried. That Adler had tried before.” Jonas wasn't sure when he worked his way over to Clarissa’s side all he knew was that Ren followed him and sat by Nona while he sat by Clarissa. “Alex, she was fearless, I think. She took out her radio and tuned into the source or whatever. We both ended up in the other dimension with the ghosts. We watched the submarine blow up, and Alex. She tried. She tried so hard to talk to them to convince them to let us go but they refused and just kept using me like a glove.” Jonas noticed that they were the only ones on the boat at this point. Thank goodness for small mercies. “The ghosts, they- they uh, offered her a deal.” Clarissa’s voice dropped almost to a whisper. “They said that if she left me behind. That if she abandoned me to the ghosts that they would let all the rest of you go. I was so-so terrified.” Clarissa began to shake as she hugged her knees to her chest. “For a moment I thought she was going to leave me, just abandon me to whatever fate the ghosts wanted. She was just standing there, looking at the gate and the portal and I was terrified. I couldn't breath, I couldn't move.” Nona wrapped her arms around Clarissa as continued to shake. “I just kept thinking of everyone I would never be able to see again and I just wanted to scream. Then she just told the ghosts no and took out her radio, I don't know what she did but the portal began collapsing and the ghosts were so angry and desperate, they just kept screaming at her. They kept trying to convince her to stop and run away.” Clarissa paused and swallowed. “They told her that if she collapsed the portal that she would be stuck in there with them, to die over and over with them. And she did it, she collapsed the portal and she saved us.” Jonas was sure he was crying but so was everyone else. His sister was gone, she promised him, that they were going to get to live together. He was excited. He had been so excited to get to know her outside of horrorville. And now, that chance was gone. “She’s stuck in there and it's all my fault.”

“Clarissa, it's no-one’s-” Nona’s words fell on deaf ears as Clarissa shot back, trembling, crying but a fierce and tortured expression on her face.

“Yes it is, I was stuck in there, I let them get such a tight hold on me that they could do whatever they wanted with me and she chose to save me by sacrificing herself. I have been horrible to her and she still saved me. I just- i can’t believe she would do that.”

“That’s Alex all right.” Ren’s voice was hollow, his best friend since childhood was gone. “Always the hero, stubborn idiotic and self-sacrificing.” Nona gently took Ren’s hand to offer him some comfort.

“What are we going to tell everyone.” Jonas didn't know how Nona wasn’t breaking down, maybe the ghost let her off early or she was just trying to be strong for Clarissa and Ren. her question was met with silence as everyone contemplated what to tell everyone. What could they tell everyone. Ghosts are haunting Edwards Island and you can talk to them through a radio and they can possess people. They would be locked in a mental institution. The silence was heavy and oppressive as they all thought about what they were going to do. Jonas could see the docks in the distance steadily approaching as the boat moved forward. Soon he would have to tell his step-mom that Alex was never coming home. He didn’t know if he would be able to survive that conversation. For now he just thought about his sister for a day and tried to memorize her face. Hoping he would never forget her. The sun was shining against his face but it brought him little warmth or comfort. What was he going to do?


	2. Time stops for No-oBoDEy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody here is the first real chapter of my fic. I am so glad that people are enjoying this so far and i hope to be able to talk to you all in the comments here and there. I hope you all enjoy the story and can't wait to hear what you think!
> 
> The song that inspired this Fic: Dance with the devil by breaking benjamin
> 
> chapter word count: 3,571  
> posted 1/12/2021

Jonas sat at his desk tapping his fingers against the laminated wood. His pencil sat discarded off to the side and his test was face down in front of him. If you had asked him before moving to Camena if he would be going to college he wouldn't have been able to tell you one way or another. But now that he was here, attending classes and working with all sorts of people. He almost would say he enjoyed it. But school is school and there were always those classes and situations that just made you hate sitting behind a desk listening to a teacher. Like now, sitting and having absolutely nothing to do. Jonas would almost swear that Mr. Philmore did things like this just to annoy his students.

Mr. Philmore was an older man with a bald head and white goatee that hugged his lower face. He was anything but a conventional teacher. Students had all sorts of theories about him, his family, even his brother's dog. Which was one of the strangest conversations Jonas has ever had and he’s seen Ren high. Mr. Philmore is one of those people that when you meet him you wonder how he ever survived waking up in the morning. Currently behind his desk Mr. Philmore sat wearing an ugly button up hawian shirt with khakis, mismatched socks and sandals. Again not a very conventional person. Even stranger than the way he dressed, acted, or the many theories about his life; was the stories he would sometimes tell them. Jonas stopped paying attention after the time Mr. Philmore told the class about how he wrestled a bear and then the next day wore a squid hat to class. 

Jonas looked over at one of his classmates who was obviously struggling with the test, and Mr. Philmore’s choice of clothing but what can you do? The middle aged man was whispering to himself pouring over his piece of paper looking like he hadn’t slept in a few weeks and was staying awake by channeling the divine might of coffee. Jonas doesn't know what is up with this class but it is very difficult. Jonas sat quietly for a few more hours(it was really minutes but it seemed like hours), his mind wandering when an alarm finally rang signaling the end of the class period. The collective groans and sighs of relief from the class filled the previously silent classroom as students stood up to turn in their tests. 

“Congratulations everyone,” Mr. Philmore stood up, his shirt an offrant to anything holy, “you all survived the course.” a few weak cheers were heard from the more outgoing students but the majority like Jonas simply ignored the comment in favor of preserving their sanity. “Remember everyone, even though we are finished with all of the exams we still have a few days left of class. So as always good day and week to you all, see you next time and don't eat the cafeteria cookies.” Jonas shook his head as some students laughed. All things considered Mr. Philmore was a very fun teacher, and Jonas enjoyed his class. Sure it was difficult. It was very difficult, Jonas didn't really believe he was all that cut out for complicated science, but he was taking the classes for a reason. Jonas enjoyed learning from him even with all his quirks. “Jonas may I talk to you for a minute?”

Jonas looked up from his desk to see Mr. Philmore standing in front of him leaning against a desk. “Sure?” Mr. Philmore spun a chair around and sat down facing him.

“I Just want to say, Jonas I am very impressed with your work over this past semester. I was hoping I could talk you into taking a few more of my classes as well as an idea I had.” Jonas nodded unsure where this was going. “You see, I have a couple of advanced classes that I offer to students that I see thriving in my usual courses, and you have set a pretty high mark.” Mr. Philmore paused making sure that Jonas was following. “I also wanted to put together a student research team. I noticed that on some of the assignments about electromagnetic waves you referenced some things we didn't cover in this class.” Jonas outwardly remained impassive but his heart seised for a moment. He couldn't exactly tell anyone why he was looking into that and didn't trust his ability to come up with a believable lie. Mr. Philmore continued seemingly unaware of Jonas’s moment of terror. “I believe that you have the mark of a great researcher or scientist one day, and I want to help you see if that path is for you. I have a few other students I have already approached about this idea and I was wondering if you would like to join. You don't have to decide right now but I thought I would bring up so you have time to give me an answer before the semester ends.” Jonas nodded. The offer sounded interesting and he would be lying if he said he was opposed to the idea, but he again doubted his ability to thrive within physics. 

“I'll think about it, just one question?” Mr. Philmore’s eyebrow shot up. “Am I going to have to suffer through you wearing more outfits that cause the rest of us sane people to have migraines?” Mr. Philmore laughed.

………………

Jonas walked through the parking lot to his car still smirking from his chat with Mr. Philmore. He was a nice guy. Jonas took a deep breath breathing in the refreshing air of the afternoon. The sun was slowly crawling below the horizon and the few clouds in the sky were painted pink and orange. A few birds flew across the sky and the ground was still wet from recent rain. Really it was a perfect day. Jonas made his way to his car, an old, beat up vehicle that he snagged from someone who was planning to scrap it. It took a little work but it had given him something to do over the summer. Jonas sat down behind the wheel and threw his bag into the passenger seat. He pulled off his hat and ran his hand through his teal hair. It was starting to fade and he would have to dye it soon. And just like that his previously good mood drained away. 

It had been two years, two forsaken years since that night. The therapist he had talked to said that eventually the feelings of grief and loss would fade that he would be fine. Jonas didn't think he would ever be fine. But telling people that and being honest with them only got him flak. ‘Other people have it worse, it's been so long, stop being so worked up about it’. The comments never stopped. So Jonas stopped being honest and started pretending. Everyone told him that he needed to move on, to live his life. But the fact was he couldn’t. He couldn’t bring himself to forget that night to forget or move on from the choices and decisions that were made. And he couldn’t free himself from the doubt or the guilt that if maybe he had tried a little harder, he would still have a sister. He was the one who had wanted to check out the tape player and because of that Alex was alone when she faced the ghosts. 

Jonas sighed and started his car. His thoughts drifted over the living hell that his life had become after that night.

_ The rest of the ferry ride back to the shore was silent. The trip from the docks to Jonas’s house was even more so. Jonas felt like his stomach was filled with lead that grew with every moment as they got closer to his home. How was he supposed to tell his dad and his step-mom that Alex was gone. He couldn't tell them about the ghosts without sounding like he had lost his mind. He didn't even know if he would be able to get the words out of his mouth. When he walked inside with his friends following him and saw his dad and his step-mom standing there he froze and when they asked about Alex his eyes watered. In the end it was Clarrissa who came to his rescue. She managed to sound composed as she told them that Alex was gone. That they had been exploring some caves and there was a cave in which they all got separated and Alex never came out. _

_ All things considered it was a pretty weak excuse, but after hearing that Alex was gone his parents didn’t really pay attention to much else. One thing led to another and the police were called, people searched for her, but nothing was ever found. For two weeks Jonas’s parents held out vain hope that somehow Alex would be found. It didn’t pay off. Eventually it was assumed that Alex was dead. _

_ Somehow Jonas’s new family stayed together. They survived and it became taboo to touch Alex’s room. Some nights though when Jonas would wake up from the nightmares. He would silently slip into his sister’s room to try and get to know her a little better. They didn’t really get much time on the island to exchange favorite colors, but he knew that she was brave, snarky, the opposite of soft spoken and not afraid of anything. He wished they had more time.  _

_ It was during one of these nights that a little worm of hope wiggled its way into Jonas’s heart as he thought about the island and its events. Could there be a way to save alex? The ghosts were insistent that they could only escape through possession through controlling someone else and taking them. But Alex wasn't one of the ghosts she traveled through the gate, couldn't she travel back? Hope, painful gut wrenching hope burrowed itself into Jonas. So he made a plan, granted it was a terrible one, but it was better than nothing. He kept it quiet and didn’t tell anyone for a while. Then during one of his conversations with Clarissa he told her. And she told Nona and Ren and they all wanted in. Ren wanted his childhood friend back. Nona felt she couldn't just abandon someone. Clarissa claimed she had a best to pay and Jonas; Jonas just wanted to be able to have his sister back. To one day have her be angry at him because she went to make a sandwich and he had eaten all the peanut butter. The plan was revised again and again, lists and supplies gathered. And then life tore them all apart. Life moved on, no ghosts, no time loops. Just forward, it just kept moving forward and all the four friends could do was look back. _

Jonas started from his memories from the honking of a car horn behind him. He accelerated through the intersection and headed towards home. Edwards island was visible through his window and he glanced down to the hole where a car radio would usually sit, wires spilled out of the gap. Jonas drove the rest of the way home focused on the road in front of him, not letting his mind wander.

He arrived home and walked in the front door. The sounds of cooking from the kitchen and a comforting smell filled his nostrils. Jonas let the door swing closed behind him and he walked down the hall.

“Hey bud, how was school?” Jonas' dad stood in the kitchen wearing an apron that was far too small for him with a couple pots simmering on the stove. Jonas looked a lot like his dad, same brown eyes, same broad shoulder build, same hair. Actually not quite on the hair, Jonas’s was dyed teal. And his dad had a fairly thick beard

“It went well. Mr. Philmore talked to me about some of his advanced classes.” Jonas’s dad stirred something on the stove while he listened.

“Isn’t that the guy that wears socks with sandals?” Jonas rolled his eyes while his dad chuckled to himself mumbling about socks and sandals and the absurdity of questionable choices. “Do you think you are going to take it? I know you have been looking into the science stuff pretty deep, what’s it called waves electro waves something.”

“I know you know it's called physics.” Jonas’s dad continued to chuckle to himself as he prepared dinner.

“I'm going up to work on school work.”

“Don’t work too hard. I want some dinner to be left for your mom.” Jonas rolled his eyes, again, as his dad’s laughter followed him upstairs. He walked up to his attic room. His room, or michaels former room as he learned a few days after the island. The thought hadn’t bothered him as much as he thought it would. He thinks Ales would be glad to see him using it. 

The hours of the evening passed quickly. Jonas had only a few finals left before he was finished with the semester. The work wasn't too difficult and Jonas found himself enjoying college more often than not. He saw Ren fairly often, and attended a few of his concerts. Jonas' eyes flickered over to a picture sitting on his desk. It showed Him, Nona, Ren and Clarissa when they had graduated from high school. Ren looked like a prancing duck in the photo and Jonas was pretty sure he was the only one actually looking at the camera as Clarissa was rolling her eyes and nona was laughing too hard to stand up straight. 

Jonas sighed as he leaned back in his chair and looked up at the ceiling. He heard the front door open and close downstairs. His mom was probably home now. Jonas’ hand reached up to the ring he still wore around his neck. He sat like that for a few minutes when his phone rang.

_ Nona: how’s everyone doing? It's been a couple days since I've heard from everyone. _

_ Ren: But we talked last night? Didn’t we? Or was that a hallucination? _

_ Nona: Ren, we talked about this you really need to cut back on your more exotic foods. _

_ Ren: Hey I swear I am. I promise I am being a good boyfriend. _

_ Clarissa: Get a room. _

_ Ren: Well hello there. You know I think I finally have the perfect nickname for everyone. _

_ Clarissa: I swear Ren if you pull out some idiotic nickname I will literally kill you. _

_ Ren: Hey, I promise, it's a good one this time. _

_ Ren: all right, starting with Nona _

_ Ren changed Nona’s nickname to “The sensible one” _

_ The sensible one: That’s not too bad. _

_ Ren: see, I can do nicknames. Now time for Jonas. _

_ Ren changed Jonas’ nickname to Convict _

_ The sensible one: And I take it back. _

Jonas rolled his eyes but smirked at the chosen nickname. Ren was probably laughing too hard right now to respond to anyone.

_ Clarissa: okay let's just get this over with. What do you have for me? _

_ Ren changed Clarissa’s nickname to Fiery HotHead _

_ Fiery HotHead: you are a dead man Ren. I am literally going to kill you. _

_ Convict: I don’t know it kinda fits. _

_ Fiery HotHead: I swear Jonas I will kill you too. _

_ The sensible one: Anyways, Clarissa, how is school going? _

_ Fiery HotHead: I hate it. I hate school, the students and EVERYONE here. _

_ Ren: she isn't changing the nickname. _

_ Fiery HotHead changed Ren’s nickname to Drug Addict _

_ Drug Addict: HEY! _

Jonas laughed as a heated debate started between the two. Well as heated as a debate can get over text. Jonas honestly missed seeing them all in person regularly. Regardless of how they originally all bonded they were good friends. The argument slowly began to die down with both nicknames still in place. And Jonas for whatever reason decided to make a rash decision. Oh well, Ren would be proud of him for giving in to his inner rebel.

_ Convict: It’s almost been 2 years. _

Jonas waited as multiple bubbles appeared at the bottom of the screen and disappeared. Jonas felt kind of bad just dropping that sentence and all the emotion it brought out of the blue. But something, stirred, inside him and he found himself glad he did. When the heck did he become such a rule follower.

_ The sensible one: how are you holding up? _

Jonas sighed, it was going to be one of those conversations

_ Convict: I’m fine, just reminiscing _

_ Drug Addict: That one word for it. _

_ The sensible one: REN!! _

_ Drug Addict: What? _

_ Convict: it's fine, really. I just miss her. _

_ Convict: I mean is it even possible to miss someone you only knew for less then a day? Especially when you spent that whole time trying not to die? _

The chat was completely still Jonas wondered what they all were thinking. It's not often you can get them all to be speechless. 

_ Fiery HotHead: I miss her too. And yes it is possible. But you won't have to miss her for much longer. We will get her back. _

Jonas felt some weight lift of his shoulders. At least Clarissa was still on board. Then again she would probably take offense if someone assumed otherwise.

_ Drug Addict: Whoa. Hold up. Are you saying it's time for us to try out our horrible plan. _

_ Fiery HotHead: Why not? We have been talking about it for 2 years. There isn’t much more we can prepare for is there. _

_ Drug Addict: Holy water? _

_ Fiery HotHead: you would melt if you got within 10 feet of the stuff. _

_ The sensible one: Are we sure we want to do this? I know how much Alex means to everyone and I want her back too. But is it even possible? I mean the ghosts used to be people too. What happens if we go looking for Alex and we just find another one of those things and we lose someone else trying to save someone who is already gone? _

It was Jonas’ turn to be speechless. He didn’t- he couldn’t-... he didn’t want to think about that. He didn’t want to see that either. He had to believe that there was still a chance. Some way to save her. Clarissa evidently thought the same.

_ Fiery HotHead: We have to try. Until I know for a fact that there is nothing we can do I am going to try. _

No one said anything for quite a while. Jonas almost thought that everyone had left when his phone dinged again.

_ The sensible one: Okay. But you have to promise me, all of you have to promise me, that there will be no heros. We are all coming back together. _

_ Fiery HotHead: With Alex. _

The chat was quiet after that. Jonas leaned back in his seat and set his phone down. He heard his mom and dad laughing downstairs. He quietly slipped out of his room and walked down the hall to Alex’s room. Standing outside the door Jonas took a deep breath and turned the knob. The room was exactly the same as it had been 2 years ago. It was clean as could be but there was a little dust resting on some of the items within the room. Jonas tried to keep it decently clean without disturbing anything. Alex’s stuff still sat where it belonged, almost untouched for two years. Only one thing had been moved. Her Journal. Jonas walked over to the desk where it sat. A few months after that night 2 years ago he had realized that he didn’t really know the person who was going to be his sister. Then he found the Journal. Jonas had tried to be respectful when he read it, just wanting to get to know Alex. And it helped some but it only made him want to ask her his question face to face. Not through the pages of a book. Jonas heard his dad calling him downstairs for dinner. “Coming!”

Jonas walked quietly to the door. He paused and looked over the room one more time. The shelves with books covered in dust. The posters on the wall, he still didn’t know what “dead space” was, the dusty bed and finally the journal on Alex’s desk. He was going to bring her back. The conviction settled in Jonas' chest and he took a deep breath and breathed out a silent promise to himself and the long abandoned room. Jonas tugged the door closed and found a smile creeping onto his face. He was going to bring her back.

O-O-O-O-O

Deep beneath the waves tucked away in flooded halls of steel, shadows twisted and writhed and a single glowing triangle hung in the center. The shadows ebbed and flowed then turned rigid and sharp as the layers and waves of time shifted. 

_ “This is not right. They have-are-will come back” _

The voices began to screech and overlap speaking in unison and separate all at once.

_ This is-was not supposed to occur. They will interfere. Our escape will be, has bee-can be broken. _

The screeching and sharp whispers continued as the ghosts argued and let their anger known. But beneath the anger and hate that dominated their existence the ghosts felt something that they haven't felt for quite some time; Fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next time, we hear from Alex!


	3. Time after Time after Time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone I was feeling motivated today so you get another chapter. I have edited the tags a little bit specifically the warnings. I don't think that it is that bad but I figured I should be safe rather then sorry.
> 
> In case i forgot to mention it this fic was inspired by the song "dance with the devil" by breaking Benjamin.
> 
> shoutout to Cithitri. The motivation to get this chapter done came from their comments.
> 
> ENJOY!!!!

Alex was exhausted. She was so very exhausted. she rubbed the side of her head with the heel of her palm as she listened to Jonas repeat the same thing he had been saying over and over.

“So you used to come here a lot right?” she knew he wasn’t playing a trick on her or anything, they were literally like jumping backwards in time or something which was just what she needed on top of everything else going on tonight. “Alex? You alright?”

“Yeah, yeah I’m fine,” it’s just that you have asked me that question how many times now? Alex didn’t know why she was so exhausted or why she felt like curling up in a ball and crying, but she did. She just wanted this night to end. She wished she never came to the island, never brought the radio, never messed with whatever was in the cave. But, she did. And now they are all stuck on this miserable island with whatever was in that cave. Alex swears this is the most terrifying night of her life. But at the same time it's not. Everything that has happened, the ghosts this time loop thingy, the ghost that burned itself into the stone wall, it all feels rehearsed. Like she has done all this before. But she hasn’t, she hasn’t done anything like this, seen anything like this, but none of this is surprising her even though it should be. Which is honestly more terrifying than the ghosts. What is happening to her.

  
  


“What is that? It's not something I would expect to see just sitting in the woods?” Alex looked up to see what Jonas was looking at to see a tape player just sitting in the middle of the path. That definitely wasn’t there before. But, at the same time it… but she had never seen one of these before. It just felt so familiar. Alex carefully approached the tape player but as she went to interact with it, it glitched. Like full on tv static glitch. The edges frayed and sections shifted out of line with each other for just a moment and then it was back to normal. Alex hesitantly reached for the device again. It didn’t glitch this time, but it started playing some music. It sounded wrong. It sounded broken. 

Alex slowly began to turn the wheel and the song seemed to speed up and fix itself. Then after a moment the world flashed around her and it was gone. Alex looked around experimentally. They didn’t appear back at the trolley, maybe the loop was over?

“Alex?” Alex turned around. Jonas was just standing there staring at her. 

“Yeah?” no response. Alex sat there for a few moments as she became increasingly awkward with Jonas just staring at her. “What, do I have something on my face?” she let a forced grin find its way to her face. Humor is always a good option right? Nothing he was still just staring. “All right,” Alex spun back around ready to move on. “Anyways we need to go find Ren still and he should be thi-”

“Why did you do it.” Alex stopped, blinked and slowly turned back around to face Jonas again. He hadn’t moved.

“Jonas are you okay? like really okay? Cause you are starting to freak me out here.” Alex tried to keep a smile on her face, but it felt forced it probably looked like it too.

“Why did you do it?” Jonas still was just standing there, and that same question.

“Why did i do what?” Alex really just wanted to get off this island. Jonas was acting weird. Or maybe this was just how he was. She has only known him for a few hours. But, she feels like he is different than how he is acting right now. She can’t explain the feeling, she just knows.

“You know what you did.” the tone of his voice yanked Alex out of her thoughts. Jonas face was scrunched up and his brow furrowed. He looked like he was looking at something repulsive, he was looking at her, like he hated her.

“No, I don't, buddy, what did I do this time.” Alex was beginning to feel increasingly uncomfortable. Was it this dark a few minutes ago? It looked like the life had been drained out of everything around her.

Jonas’ face and voice turned predatory and his hands curled into fists. “You know exactly what you did. Stop lying to me.”

“Jonas what is wrong with you, why are you acting like this.” Ales was truly scared right now. How does someone flip so suddenly from nice guy to serial killer.

“What's wrong with me!?” he scoffed. “What’s wrong with you?” Alex tried to respond but Jonas cut her off. “No! You don’t get to talk right now. Miss perfect.” Jonas took a step towards her and Alex took a step back. A sneer made its way across Jonas' face as he continued to talk. “You just think you are so much better than everyone else don’t you. You think you haven't done anything wrong, can't do anything wrong.” Alex didn’t really know where any of this was coming from. At least it didn’t feel like this was rehearsed like the rest of her night. She would almost prefer that feeling though instead of whatever was happening now.

“I don’t think I'm perfect Jonas, cut it out. We need to go find Ren.” Alex turned around to keep walking hoping she sounded braver than she felt. Searing pain exploded in her wrist and the air rushed out of her lungs in a painful gasp. She felt herself yanked back and thrown to the ground. Her wrist was definitely going to bruise.

“I’m not done talking to you yet.” Jonas stood over her hate and contempt filling his features. Alex felt small. Very, very small. “Tell me Alex do you think everyone will forgive you for everything you have done.” Jonas chuckled, “spoiler alert, nope.” Alex couldn't respond. She really wanted this nightmare to be over. “This is all your fault Alex. The cave, the ghosts, all of it is your fault. You just had to bring the radio, you just had to use it and play detective with whatever was in that cave.” Alex really wanted this to stop

“WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE OUT HERE AND IT IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!” Jonas leered over her. Alex could feel her shoulders shaking. “Oh I’m sorry,” his voice was mocking, “did I make the big tough girl cry, my bad.” that last part was said with humor. She could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks as she hugged her bruised wrist to her chest.

“It wasn’t my idea to mess with the cave that was yo-”

“STOP TRYING TO BLAME EVERYONE ELSE FOR YOUR MISTAKES ALEX!!” Alex Flinched when he yelled at her. She squeezed her eyes shut and took a few deep breaths.

“It wasn't my idea, and I was asked to bring the radio Jonas.” Alex felt angry and hurt. She really wanted off this island. “So just chill out an-”

“Oh you are trying to blame this on me now. And I thought we were friends.” Alex peered around Jonas to see Ren walking up to them, looking just as angry as Jonas. “Gosh Alex, what is wrong with you. You keep trying to blame this on everyone else. Take responsibility for your own actions would you.”

“Ren, I-” Alex thought she could get through to him, they have known each other forever. Apparently that wasn’t good enough.

“Oh shut up Alex.” She had never seen Ren like this before. “No one is buying your sob story. I know what you say about me when I’m not around.” Ren coked a hip and put a hand to his forehead imitating the old movies where ladies were quite overdramatic. In any other circumstance this would be hilarious. “Oh Ren, oh he’s harmless, he’s just a good guy, he couldn’t hurt a fly, he’s just a little weird, you’ll get used to him eventually.” Ren rolled his eyes and stood up straight crossing his arms over his chest and stared down Alex. “Try to be a little more condescending, why don’t ya.”

“Ren, I never meant-” Alex REALLY, REALLY wanted this night to end.

“OH, just save it Alex. no one wants to hear your excuses.” Ren turned his eyes away from her, as if she was despicable to look at. It hurt so badly.

Alex looked down at the ground. She just wanted all of this to end. After they got out she could deal with all of this. But right now she had to survive, had to get out of this. “Look,” she hoped she sounded braver than she felt. “If you guys want to do this, we can do this later,” Alex stood up and set her face like stone. “But right now we need to focus so we can get off this island. Afterwards you can yell at me and tell me you hate me all you want but right now we need to focus.” Maybe someday in the future Alex could fix whatever broke here on this island. Right now she just wanted to cry.

“If it isn’t wonder girl,” Alex closed her eyes and tried very hard to keep her scream internal. Only a heavy sigh escaped her. At least this one could be expected. “Trying to run away again?” Alex turned around to see Clarissa marching towards her.

“Clarissa.” Clarissa had the same loathing in her eyes that she always did. Alex just tried not to think how it also matched Ren’s and Jonas’ expressions behind her. “Clarissa, now that you are here all we have to do is find n-” Alex cut off as Clarissa stopped right in front of her and smacked her across the cheek with impressive force knocking her to the ground. Alex didn’t even try to get back up, she just let herself lay there as Clarissa leaned in to yell in her face. Spittle landing on her cheek.

“You just can’t help yourself can you. You are just bent on ruining everyone’s lives. And making everyone miserable aren’t you. You worthless piece of trash.” Alex let the tears flow freely down the sides of her face. too exhausted to argue or even try to sound composed.

“Yep, that’s me.” Alex could barely get the words out, her throat was tight with emotion. Another slap rang out across the clearing and Alex’s cheek burned. She didn’t know anyone could slap that hard.

“Save it, maybe you think it's funny to ruin our lives but no one else does. How can you be so selfish? Do you even understand how much everyone hates you? Honestly I’m surprised your mom hasn’t kicked you out yet.” Clarissa scoffed and stood up straight checking her nails. “Honestly it's no wonder your dad ditched you, I can't think of anyone who would want to stick around you. Really your dad is the lucky one.” Alex let herself curl into a ball on the ground. She couldn't remember when it started drizzling, she was covered in mud but she didn’t care. She was so cold, and her heart just hurt.

“You know maybe it's a good thing you let Michael drown.” She didn’t, she did not just-. Alex felt anger well up in her throat like bile as she shoved her way to her feet.

“You shut up right now!” Clarissa went wide eyed as Alex yelled. Good. “I loved Michael, and I did not let him drown. That day was the worst day of my life, being unable to do anything but watch him die, it was horrible.” Clarissa’s eyes turned stormy as she leaned back into Alex's face.

“Unable to, or didn’t want to?” Alex took a step back in shock. Did Clarissa really think she wanted Michael to drown. Alex opened her mouth to respond but was cut off. “Oh just save it Alex, no one wants to hear it. We all know what kind of person you are. You are selfish and horrible. No one loves you Alex. we all only put up with you cause it's the right thing to do.” Alex went to respond but was once again cut off by another voice.

“Clarissa!” Nona came racing out of the woods and crashed into Clarissa hugging her tight.

Alex wanted to laugh. Was this really all it took, everyone yelling at her to get everyone together. She really wanted to go home. “Great, we’re all here now. Can we just find a way to go home now.”

“What's wrong, Alex.” Alex wanted to cry at least one person wasn’t acting as if she was personally responsible for the sins of the world.

“Nothing, Nona. I just really want to go home.” Nona looked at her with sympathy or was that pity.

“It's okay Nona, you don’t have to pretend anymore. She knows.” Alex didn’t know if just crying was going to be enough for this. Nona looked uncomfortable and avoided looking Alex in the eyes. “Come on Nona, tell her what you really think and then we can leave.” Nona then met Alex’s gaze and sighed

“I’m sorry Alex, I really wanted to give you a chance.” Nona actually looked remorseful, it almost made everything she said that much worse. “I mean, I’ve heard the stories about you. And I just couldn’t believe that someone could be that horrible. I really wanted to give you a chance. I thought maybe you were just hurting and took it out on others. Or maybe everyone just misunderstood you. But, i just-,” Alex just closed her eyes. She just wanted to die right now. Is this really how everyone thought about her? That she was some horrible person that was out to get everyone. Did everyone really hate her this much? “I’m sorry Alex. But you’re just horrible.”

“It's fine Nona, lets just go home.” Alex didn’t think she could take anymore without just falling over dead.

“Fine.” Clarissa spun around and everyone followed her. Alex stood still as Ren and Jonas shoved past her, clipping her with their shoulders. Then everyone stopped.

“Alex?” Alex’s broken heart froze. I-it couldn’t be, he-he was dead. Alex felt like she was drowning. “Alex, what’s going on.” everyone in front of her had already turned around to gape at the new arrival. Alex slowly turned around and her heart broke to unbelievable depths. Michael. Michael was here, her brother was here. He was just standing there. His blue and white shirt and jeans. He looked like he had just gotten ready to go out for a walk. The rain made some of his hair stick to his forehead. He looked just like how she remembered him. Alex was unable to stop herself as she took a few steps forward before running and crashing into the one person she had missed so much. “Oh Alex.”

Alex had to be dead, or maybe this was a hallucination. Yeah that sounds right. She fell and hit her head or maybe she got drunk on the beach and was asleep. It felt so real. She could smell Michael as she buried her face into his shirt, she could feel him hugging her back. She really wanted to go home. 

“Alex,” Alex took a step back as Michael looked her in the eyes with a sad smile on his face. He rested a hand against her mud covered cheek. Alex just let herself feel this moment. She missed him so much. “Alex, why did you do it?” Alex felt her heart seize as she tried to choke out words, maybe a coherent sentence. “Alex why did you do it?” Michael asked her again but this time any brotherly love or care was gone from his voice. His face was filled with seething hatred. And Alex felt herself crack and break. Michael clamped his hand down on her wrist with excruciating force. “Why did you let me drown?” Alex could feel the hatred radiating off of Michael, the hatred of her.

Alex couldn’t respond, couldn’t comprehend what was happening. “Do you know what it felt like to drown?” Michael’s hand clamped down tighter around her wrist. Alex gasped in pain and tried to pull away, but Michael only tightened his grip. It felt like her hand was going to shatter. “Do you know what it felt like to have my lungs filled with water, unable to scream or call for help. To look up and see you watching and choosing to do nothing. To see my life flash before my eyes as my sister did nothing to help, nothing to save me.” Alex stammered to try and respond, to say anything to stop this horror show. But Michael's hand clamped around her throat and squeezed. She couldn’t breath, couldn't breath. “Save your excuses, I trusted you Alex. I loved you, what did I do that you saw it fit to let me die? Our parents split up because of you, because you were a coward. Save us the trouble of carting your sorry carcass back home.” Alex's vision began to go black as Michael lifted her off of her feet and into the air by her throat. She pulled at his arm with her free hand but she couldn’t do anything. “I am ashamed to have been your brother.” Alex felt her back collide with the ground with incredible force and heard something snap. She felt her wrist shatter as she lay in the mud struggling to breathe. Alex screamed in her mind as the pain racked her body. Unable to make anything more than choked sobs through her damaged throat she lay in the mud tears streaming down her face. She just wanted this to end. She wanted all of this to end.

…………..

The ghosts gathered in the empty air above the broken girl. She was still resisting them, still fighting their possession, fighting their control. She would give up eventually and when she did they would be free. Her memory would be erased and no one would leave to remember her. Their plan was almost complete. But still the children were coming ready to fight. They should have been this violent before. The girl would be damaged and broken but they would be free, finally free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Closer and closer to the showdown


	4. Edwards Ho

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody, Im really happy to see that people are enjoying this fic. This chapter gets a little intense so fair warning. Also I am starting my spring semester for college so update might be a bit slower but I will try to keep updating regularly.

A few weeks later…...

The Airport was pretty busy when Jonas and Ren arrived. The airport wasn’t the largest Jonas had seen, but he had travelled a bit with his dad before coming to Camera. Ren however had never set foot inside an airport before having lived his whole life in the same place. His reactions were almost comical. Both Nona and Clarissa were flying in today and thankfully their planes were arriving within an hour of each other so he and Ren wouldn’t be waiting for too long.

“So like we can’t go see the airplanes.” Jonas wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or strangle Ren.

“No Ren we can’t go watch the planes. We are just here to pick up Nona and Clarissa.”

“That’s kinda stupid. What's the point of having an airport if you can’t watch the airplanes take off and land. What else do you have to do in an airport.” Ren seemed actually offended by the idea he wasn’t allowed to watch the airplanes take off and land. But Jonas suspected he was just bored.

“It's not like we are picking up your girlfriend or anything.” Jonas rolled his eyes as he spoke. Some Days he really wanted to strangle his friend.

“Clarissa isn’t my girlfriend.” Ren met Jonas’ glare with a smirk. “Just thought I would clarify. You know how girlfriends can be, they can get jealous easily.”

“I can get what now?” Jonas choked on laughter as Nona walked up to them with her bags staring down Ren. Ren on the other hand was stumbling over his words as his face lit up bright red. Nona was wearing a grey jacket with a yellow scarf. Her hair was done up in a bun on top of her head. She looked ready to go for a hike.

“It was a joke I swear. You are beautiful and amazing and I would never think anything bad of you.” Jonas tried to swallow more laughter as Nona glanced over at him as she tried to keep her smile hidden.

“I don’t know Ren you sounded pretty convinced when you said it. I don’t know if I can trust you anymore.” Ren somehow got even more red in the face as he struggled to find a solution to the predicament he had buried himself in. And that was about the point where Nona lost her own battle against laughter. Quite a few people gave them a few looks but Jonas didn’t really care as he struggled to regain his composure. Ren let out a heavy sigh and most of the red drained from his face.

“Don’t scare me like that, my heart was like seizing.” Nona finally regained her composure as took a few deep breaths.

“You love me and you know it.” Ren just shook his head and he and Nona gave each other a hug and kiss. Jonas rolled his eyes.

“Get a room, you two.” Ren chuckled as he and Nona broke apart. Nona quickly gave Jonas a hug and then he and Ren carried Nona’s luggage to Jonas’s car parked on the curb.

“How is this thing still running.” Nona’s question was meat with chuckles from Ren and a sigh from Jonas. The car in question was an old beat up Jeep; it was missing both doors and had mismatched headlights. Jonas had been putting a lot of work into the car’s more essential components. He hadn’t gotten to the other parts yet.

“Don’t worry everyone, it will get us where we need to go and much farther. I fixed it up myself.”

“That fills me with such confidence.” Nona laughed at Ren’s comment and Jonas just shook his head.

“How about we go inside and wait for Clarissa now? That would be a much better use of our time, instead of laughing at my car.” Ren chuckled on their way back inside but didn’t say anything else on the topic. He and Nona talked and caught up on anything they missed talking about on their weekly phone calls. Jonas just leaned against the wall and enjoyed the peace and quiet of the relatively small airport they were at.

About half an hour later they spotted Clarissa making her way over to them two suitcases beside her and a bag strung across her shoulders. She looked like she was doing well there were noticeable bags under her eyes but Jonas suspected that was just from lack of sleep. Her hair was still done the same way as it was when he had met her. She was wearing jeans and a teal jacket over a red shirt. She stopped short of the group and rolled her eyes before holding her arms out to her sides as an invitation for a hug. Nona acted immediately and looked like she was squeezing the life out of her friend. Ren walked up with a smirk on his face only to be pushed away by Clarissa. “Not you Ren, I don't need to smell like drugs when I say hi to my parents.”

“I’m wounded Clarissa, I thought we were friends.” Ren placed a hand on his chest over his heart and wore a face normally found on pouting two year olds.

“Well you thought wrong, I’m friends with Nona and you are an acquaintance. We can consider Jonas a friend for now.” Clarissa then grabbed her luggage and led the way out of the airport. They quickly loaded up Clarissa’s luggage piled into the vehicle and left the airport behind them. Clarissa was sitting in the passenger seat and Nona and Ren sat in the backseat talking and giggling.

“So wonder boy, how is good old Camena doing? Has someone burned it down yet?” Jonas looked over at Clarissa to see her rummaging through one of her bags.

“Be careful not to lose anything out of the door. And yeah it's doing well, pondered burning down a few times but figured I didn’t need to go to jail again. That said if you need help burning it down I've got your back.” Clarissa paused and let out what sounded like a suppressed snort before resuming rummaging through her bag. “What are you even looking in there for?”

Clarissa paused and seemed to think about the question before responding. “You’ll see, it's not quite finished yet so I'm not going to say anything. Once it's done I'll show you guys.” Jonas shrugged and refocused on the road ahead of him. Thankfully the roads were pretty empty. Most people were in the last few weeks of school. There was still just enough time left that you couldn't justify leaving on a vacation yet. Jonas himself still had a few assignments to turn in but they were done and he just needed to make a trip to turn them in. “How is school going, you still have a week or two left, right.”

“Yeah, I have all the work done I just need to turn it all in.” Clarissa hummed in response and continued to dig around in her bag for a few more minutes before she seemed satisfied and put the bag away. The sky was steadily getting dark as the sun neared the horizon soon bathing the surrounding landscape in a soft golden glow. Nona and Ren soon passed out sitting in the back seat.

“Are you ready for this?” Clarissa’s voice was pitched low to not disturb the 2 sleeping in the backseat. Jonas gave a low strained chuckle.

“Are you?” he didn’t need to specify what he was talking about. It was the main thing that had been dominating his thoughts for the past few weeks. And honestly he was not ready. He was not ready to face that nightmare again. To go in to try and save Alex. And he was most definitely not ready for the possibility of nothing being left of her to find. Jonas could feel Clarissa staring at him for

“Yes, I am.” Jonas looked over at her to meet her gaze. Her eyes were sharp and her jaw set. She looked ready to kill someone. Jonas looked back to the road and responded softly.

“Yeah, me too.” he was lying, of course but he wasn’t going to let fear stop him. If nothing else he had to know what happened to Alex to have some form of closure. Regardless of the outcome of this idiotic idea of theirs, It was time to move forward. Jonas could only hope that he would be moving forward with his sister instead of moving on from her death.

_ The next few weeks passed quickly. Clarissa and Nona were spending the summer break with their parents. Ren had a few band gigs that they all attended. And his band was actually pretty decent. Their name was still horrendous and the names of the songs were even worse but the music itself wasn’t too bad. 2 weeks before their chosen date to go to the island Jonas went to his school to drop off his assignments. _

Jonas knocked on the edge of the doorframe to Mr. Philmore’s class. This was the last assignment he had to hand in before he was completely finished for the semester. After hearing the soft come in originating from Mr. Philmore’s office at the front of the room. Jonas walked in and headed up to wait at Mr. Philmore’s desk.

“Jonas, good to see you. How was the assignment?” Mr. Philmore came out of his office and Jonas was shocked to see that he was actually wearing something that looked normal. He had a clean button up shirt and Jeans. Jonas shook his head wondering what the heck changed and Mr. Philmore noticed his surprise. “Yes I know, I don't look like a circus clown today.” his voice was filled with mirth. “So far my favorite reaction was a girl who just walked out and had her friend turn her assignment in for her.”

Jonas shook his head again and chuckled. “Yeah, that sounds like an appropriate response. Anyways I just wanted to get this turned in before I headed back home.” Mr. Philmore took the assignment from Jonas and drooped into a file in one of the drawers of his desk.

“Have you thought about what we talked about a few weeks ago.” Jonas sighed and looked up. He hadn’t thought about it much. With his friends and their little plan he had barely been able to sleep.

“No, I haven't given it much thought recently. It's interesting but I just haven't decided yet.” Mr. Philmore just smiled and nodded.

“Well just be sure to reach out to me before next semester starts if you are interested. I hope to see you again Jonas.” Jonas smiled and bid Mr. Philmore farewell. He headed back to his car and took a deep breath. With the last of his school assignments out of the way the last thing possibly interfering with the plan was taken care of. Jonas was extremely nervous.

_ With all obstacles to their plan taken care of the four friends began to plan rigorously. Their main focus was on how to actually duke it out with ghosts. Granted none of them really knew how to deal with that so they hashed out other details. Supplies, how to get into the cave, who was in charge of which aspects of the plan. About a week before they boarded the ferry Clarissa revealed her secret project. _

“So what are you calling this again?” Nona’s question broke the stunned silence that had settled over the group.

“I’m calling it project DeepGate.” Clarissa put her hand up to cut off Ren who was about to say something. “And before you laugh, yes I know it sounds nerdy and totally like something from a sci-fi movie. But it sounded like something Alex would do, so it felt right.” Clarissa glared at Ren daring him to make a comment. He wisely did not.

“How long have you been working on this.” Nona’s soft voice eased some of the tension in the room.

“From the beginning.” and that was what was throwing Jonas for a loop. Clarissa had already been planning to go back when Jonas told her about his plan. It was surprising to think that Clarissa had no hesitation in going back for Alex even though they had been bitter enemies. It was so strange, but heartwarming in a way.

“Well we have the how, What’s next?” Ren’s question quickly spurred them back into planning for their little adventure.

_ The following passed quickly. With little left to do other than buy supplies. The four friends took some time to try and relax and enjoy each other’s company. Soon the day arrived and under the guise of an all-nighter for fun around town the four friends boarded the last boat to Edwards Island. _

The island was dark and gloomy. But maybe that was just because he knew what was dwelling here. He could almost feel the eyes of the ghosts staring at him. Almost feel their hatred. Jonas, Clarissa, Nona and Ren were all silent as they stepped off of the ferry. Just being here was painful. “Keep moving forward right?” Jonas turned to look at Nona, she was staring dead ahead with a calm expression, Ren looked nervous and Clarissa looked angry.

“Yeah keep moving forward.” Jonas turned back around to lead the group deeper into the island. One way or another this all ended tonight.

  
  


_ But the four friends were not the only ones planning. The sunken having seen the four coming had been pouring every once of hate and suffering they had experienced into the loop, into breaking Alex. But the girl remained strong. The anger and hate flew from the ghosts, increasing every day and every loop that the girl managed to survive and resist their control. Even using the faces of her friends and dead-dying brother. The ghosts could not get the girl to break. But they were so close. They could feel the desperation, the self loathing, and pain wearing down on the girl’s soul. They could almost taste their victory. But the girl held on. Through abuse and torture the girl held on. The amounting fear drove the ghosts to be more brutal, more violent with each and every loop. Going so far as to physically torture her through the guise of her friends. But nothing had-will-was working. There was one last thing to try. _

“Hey Alex you there?” Alex’s head shot up as she looked around. Wasn’t I just.. No that's not right. Alex squeezed her eyes shut and held her head in her hands. Her wrist really hurt so did her head. What the heck did she do between the parking lot and the ferry. Alex took a deep breath as the air caught in her throat. “Hey Alex, are you-were-will . . .  **_A-lex, wh-”_ **

A shattering noise filled the air and Alex desperately slammed her hands over her ears to stop the horrendous noise from rattling inside her head. Alex hunkered down against the railing as her head spun and she lost her balance. Her head was still ringing and she could taste blood in her mouth.

After what seemed like hours, the ringing finally stopped. The relief was immense, almost enough to make Alex cry. She slowly uncovered her ears and was met with complete silence. Alex’s eyes flickered open. Everything around her seemed frozen. The waves were completely still, a seagull was just stuck in midair without moving an inch and the ferry was no longer swaying with the waves. Alex turned around to face Jonas and Ren at the front of the boat and gaped at what she saw.

Hovering in the air was a giant crack like a shattered mirror or cracked glass. She couldn't see anything behind it and its edges seemed to reach to the horizons. Alex swallowed down the fear climbing in her throat and carefully approached the mystery before her. The cracks themselves seemed to faintly glow but the spaces in between seemed dark and foreboding. Regardless of what she felt Alex found herself reaching forward and the moment her fingertips touched the hanging shards, Alex found herself sieged by indescribable pain. Alex couldn't think, couldn't move, her body couldn't even waste the time to cry as she fell forward into the crack-

and fell

.

.

and fell 

.

.

.

.

and fell

.

.

.

.

.

.

Alex’s body slammed into hard ground but despite the pain nothing seemed to break. After a few calming breaths, Alex pushed herself to her feet as the pain abated. This place felt familiar, too familiar. 

_ “Hello Alex, it's so good to see you again.”  _ Alex looked up into the inky blackness surrounding her and saw two glowing red eyes. And then another set. And another. And another.  _ “Is. Leave. Possible.”  _ Alex tried to respond but it felt like her head was being torn apart. She heard cackling laughter above her and then something broke. A presence a feeling tore its way into Alex’s mind with reckless abandon. The pain was unbearable, What was this island. But she left the island. No she was on her way to the island. Micheal is alive, Micheal is dead. Clarissa doesn’t exist, she does exist. Jonas hates her, he doesn't hate her.

Alex vaguely registered tears flowing down her cheeks. Her mind was breaking more each and every moment. She dimly realizes that she is on her knees. And then the pain overtakes all her logical thought as her mind is flooded with decades of memories, decades of torture and pain and living the same night over and over. Alex didn’t know what was real anymore. It hurt so much. Everything was real, all of it. All the deaths and all the living. The sacrifices and the pain and feelings. It all hurt so much.  _ “Would you like to play a game?!” Alex hated that voice, hated it and still it spoke. “Sleepy time gal. There will be other ships, and OUR souls shall sail them.” _

_ Alex was drowning, in her mind in her own body. “Leave. Possible.” with those words Alex’s lungs and throat filled. It felt like she was drowning in syrup. The thick substance filled ever crevice inside her lungs and throat. SHE COULDN’T BREATH!! The pain was unbearable. Was this what Micheal felt like when he drowned, when he suffered. Lost beneath the waves forced to watch as his sister did nothing. Alex was choking and couldn’t breath her lungs burned for air but none would come. Alex wished she would just die, but the ghosts, the sunken. They-they kept her awake, kept her alive through all of it. She was aware of every minute particle of pain racking her body from throughout all the decades she had lived on this island. She really was a screw up. The words of her friends tore through her mind as she curled around herself in pain. Worthless. Despicable. Vile. Murderer… Over and Over and Over. she wasn’t aware someone could hate another so much. “Brave girl, Foolish girl.” Alex still couldn’t breath, still wouldn’t fall asleep. She began to claw at her throat as she began to sink into the ground. Unable to move her legs as they were pulled underneath. As she sunk something began to force its way down her throat. It felt slimy and cold. She could feel her throat stretch as something too big went down too small of a hole. “They are all gone anyway. Do Not Resist. It will all be over soon.” Alex clawed at the ground as her neck began to sink into the ground beneath her. And the earth soon covered her head and face. And finally, darkness engulfed her mind. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are going to get worse before they get better. Let me know if you guys would like me to starts doing chapter summaries and if there are any questions you have about this fic or others i have. I plan to start writing a few different ones. Hope ya'll have a great day.


	5. Showdown Part 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, stuff gets real here. you have been warned.

Arriving at the dock to Edwards Island was...quiet. Not one of the four had any idea what to say. Jonas only had terrible memories of this place and even worse nightmares of red eyes, figures in the shadows and the back of a head with teal hair. Ren had some good memories of the island times spent with friends during parties and such, but he couldn’t forget nor could he keep his mind off of the fact that this island stole his best friend from him. Clarissa felt like she was walking on her own grave the moment she stepped off the boat. Coming back only served to tear horrific memories from behind their locks. Memories of being stuck in a body not under her control and her voice controlled and mixed with radio static and the voices of those lost to time. Nona seemed the least affected by the memories of the island. But underneath her carefully created facade, she was terrified. She could feel the whispers in the back of her mind threatening and tempting her to give into her fear to curl up and stop fighting. Not one of them could keep their thoughts from venturing to a brave girl who gave everything to protect them. And that shared thought gave them resolve, determination and hope. They would not leave this island empty handed. Whether they would be leaving with another person or closure was up to fate if you believe in that sort of thing. But each one of the four friends would fight with every ounce of thought and strength that they could muster.

The main street was quiet and every shadow seemed to hold eyes and hate filled thoughts. It felt oppressive. A thin fog hung over the small town, which was very uncharacteristic for the season. Even more unnerving was the frost that clung to the windows and the chill that grasped at their cheeks and noses with sharp talons. Jonas was more than a little unnerved by the atmosphere. He was completely terrified. He could feel his insides turning as they all stepped off of the dock. Their footsteps echoed as they all walked down the street passing the frost covered windows. The sunset painted the island in pastel colors of pink and orange. Normally Jonas would enjoy the colors but right now it just looked like the life was being drained from the sky. 

The plan was fairly simple. With the cave still being collapsed from the last time they were all here they would have to use the response and call system to access the caves. Jonas and Clarissa were heading to the station in the woods while Nona and Ren stayed behind at Hardeen tower to accept the signal. Clarissa would then use the DeepGate to open and hold the temporal rift down in the cave. They were hoping that the search and rescue groups had not sealed up the buker for good. They had bolt cutters and a few other tools to deal with locks and the electrified fence, but they didn’t have anything capable of getting through a bunker door. They made their way past the first few shops and were passing the antique shop when something moved in the corner of Jonas eye. Jonas could hear the startled shouts of his friends as he whirled and faced the...Window? Jonas ignored the questions from his friends and stepped closer to the Antique shop window. There was a figure in the window. It looked like..

“Jonas? You alright there buddy?” Jonas started at Ren’s question looking at him and then looking back at the window. The figure he saw was gone. It was just his reflection.

“Yeah, I'm good, just thought I saw something.” Jonas shook his head and gave his friends a smile to meet their questioning gazes. He took one last look at the store window before they all left the paved road to head towards the tower. What they didn’t see was the figure of a girl, glitch into existence in the reflection of the mirror staring at them with blood red eyes.

  
  


…………..

  
  


_ They are here… we are not ready, the girl is still unbroken, unconsumed… Her spirit is strong...we need more time...time, seconds are days, minutes are hours, days become decades, WE CONTROL TIME… yet it has abandoned us...we must distract them...keep them busy...Do You WAnT to Play A gAme. _

…………..

  
  


Ren was not happy, he was really not happy. Jonas was acting really weird, he kept glancing over his shoulder and looked extremely paranoid. Ren just wanted a brownie, not even one with drugs, he just wanted a nice normal brownie. That decides it, when they got back he was going to make some brownies. The four friends trudged through the forest following dirt paths towards the tower that was steadily getting closer. Ren was finding that his usual enjoyment of the island was lacking, well the enjoyment he remembered before Alex disappeared. He hadn’t visited the island since then, even when his family had gone on trips, he always found an excuse to not go. Then again his mom probably wasn’t trying too hard to get him to come considering...just...everything.

Honestly Ren was finding he didn’t feel great about this plan. It was half baked and tossed together based on what they could find sitting around in some fancy books. But if there was any chance that they could get Alex back they had to take it right. Ren just hoped that whatever came of this they didn’t lose anyone else. Because so far the track record for winning against the ghosts was 0-2. In the ghosts favor. Ren was terrified. They soon passed by the gate to Maggie Adler’s house, it was locked up without anything new which gave Ren hope that the bunker was similarly just closed back up. Ren’s hopes paid off as they hiked up the steep hill to see the bunker door closed and just as uninviting as it was two years ago. 

No one said a word as they came across the split in the trail where the group split up, Ren and Nona towards the tower, Jonas and Clarissa deeper into the woods. Ren double checked that the walkie talkie he had was on. With a sure way to communicate back and forth hopefully no one would be getting lost. Who knew what would happen when they messed with the ghosts. Ren really hoped this wouldn’t be the last time he saw Jonas or Clarissa, they had all become really good friends in the past couple years and he didn’t think he could bear losing another friend. Nona must have seen his worry because she took his hand and squeezed. “We’ll be alright Ren. we are all going home together.” Ren gave her a smile that didn’t reach his eyes and squeezed her hand back. He really loved Nona. The past two years had actually been some really great years for him. Between his band taking off, his and Nona’ relationship, and his friends he was really enjoying his life. Maybe that was why he had agreed to this plan. Because Alex gave up her chance at life to give him his. He really hoped this plan would work.

Ren and Nona soon arrived at the electrified fence. Oddly enough the electricity was already off. Ren wondered if the rescue crew just didn’t look at it very closely when they were here. He wasn’t complaining. It certainly made his job easier. He and Nona made their way to the top of the tower. Apprehension filled Ren’s gut as they reached the top and slipped inside the tower. Everything for the system to open the bunker was in working order, Ren let out a sigh of relief. Nona slipped her walkie talkie off of her belt and spoke clearly. “We’re all good on our end, ready to receive the call.”

…………

Clarissa quickly grabbed her walkie talkie as she heard Nona’s voice. Jonas looked over his shoulder at her as she raised the walkie talkie to her lips to respond. “We hear you, we’ll be at the station soon. And Ren, try not to do anything stupid.” Clarissa clipped the walkie talkie back to her belt and jogged to catch back up with Jonas. Clarissa felt weird being back on the island. Her insides squirmed at every corner and she felt like she was waiting for something to attack her. Considering her previous experience she felt like it wasn’t paranoia. Clarissa sighed. When she had made plans to come back to the island she was terrified at first, constantly second guessing herself out of fear and worry. But now, now she was just pissed. These manic ghosts had thought to possess and hurt them just because they were angry that they died and didn’t want to move on. Granted it was probably more complicated than that but Clarissa couldn’t help but hate them. Having been almost completely possessed by them, Clarissa felt she out of the four friends understood the ghosts the best. And she hated them. Her friends would describe Clarissa as a fire. With them she was like a campfire, fierce and wild but contained. When she was around those she didn’t like she was a large bonfire, daring anyone who got close enough to try and put her out. They would always run away burned. But here, on the island, surrounded by memories of pain and possession she was a rocket engine. Sleek and compact ready to explode with fury and hellfire. 

The island had been a wake up call for Clarissa. She had seen a lot of herself in the ghosts if she was being honest. She would never admit it but she knew it was. That same anger and hate, directed at everything and everyone around her. She had been just like the ghosts. That’s probably why they had such an easy time taking her. It had taken Alex sacrificing herself to save them to wake Clarissa up. Alex, the little sister of her boyfriend, really her little sister for a long while and as soon as Michael had died Clarissa had taken out all of her anger on Alex. Clarissa owed this to Alex. Clarissa only hoped that once they got Alex back that she would have the chance to fix broken bridges. Clarissa also really wanted to hurt the ghosts.

“You’re scowling again.” Clarissa flicked her eyes up to Jonas to give him an unimpressed glare that would have melted lesser beings. But sadly having been good friends for the past couple years, Jonas was entirely unaffected. Jonas gave her a disinterested glance back before turning around continuing on their path. After taking unnecessary risks by jumping over a gap, Jonas glanced over his shoulder at Clarissa again. “So how do you feel?” Clarissa shot him another glare. “I’m not trying to pry, just, its this place you know.” Clarissa sighed. She really wished that they could all just get this done in silence. In and out. She also knew that Jonas was nervous and trying to distract himself. When did she become the mother hen.

“I’m fine Jonas, ready to get this done. Maybe punch a ghost on the way out for Alex.” That got a laugh out of Jonas. Clarissa did care about her friends, she just wasn’t the best at showing it. Honestly the island changed all of their lives. Ren and Nona got together, Jonas opened up and Clarissa got her wake up call. But Alex, Alex had her life stolen from her. While the island had traumatized the group of friends and given them nightmares, it had also given them all each other. It had just taken Alex away. But that was why they were here. The ghosts were vile disgusting creatures. When she was possessed Clarissa was able to see the obsession that had begun to build over the  _ “sleepy time gal.”  _ It was sickening really. The ghosts believed that Alex was their ticket back into the world, their ship to sail. Clarissa refused to let Alex be used like that. Clarissa let her eyes flicker back over to Jonas, his shoulders were hunched and his fingers played with the edges of his jacket. “We are going to save her Jonas. I promise you.” Jonas let out a heavy sigh and Clarissa knew she had hit on exactly what he was worrying about. Jonas was quiet for a minute before he spoke, but when he did his voice was heavy with barely restrained emotion.

“Are we though, I mean we have a good plan, we’ve spent forever figuring out, but what if there isn’t anything left to find.” Clarissa vaguely registered that he was crying. This was hurting him a lot more than she thought. It made sense though, now that she thought about it. Jonas had been the one to be travelling around the island with Alex all night. It made sense that he would take her loss deeply. “I’m Not backing out or giving up, I-...I just don’t know if i can handle it if all of this was for nothing.” Clarissa grabbed Jonas’s arm and turned him around to face her, halting their progress towards the forest station. Clarissa squeezed Jonas’s shoulders as she stared him in the eyes. 

“Look at me Jonas.” Clarissa noticed that her voice was uncharacteristically soft, but quickly refocused on Jonas. “We are going to save her. Alex is strong, ridiculously so. She will be there. And when we save her we are all going to go out for pizza or something and before you know it Alex will be laughing and joking along with us.” Clarissa watched as a myriad of emotions stormed across Jonas’s face and through his eyes. Finally his shoulders lumped and Jonas let out a small sigh. Clarissa gently pulled him into a hug. Clarissa would deny to her last breath that she enjoyed any sort of physical contact. But simple hugs or similar gestures with her close friends, she would miss them if they stopped. But she has a reputation to uphold. “Alright hug is over. I can’t handle you sappy dorks.” Jonas let out a wet laugh as he rubbed his eyes with the palm of his hands. Clarissa was relieved to see determination take hold. 

“You know, hanging out with us “sappy dorks” makes you by extension a sappy dork.” Clarissa let her distaste show on her face and rolled her eyes as Jonas laughed.

“Screw you, I have a reputation to uphold.” Jonas laughed again and Clarissa let a smile work its way onto her face. This will work. It has too. Jonas’s laughter cut short and turned into choking. Before Clarissa could even take a single step, she felt something dark and cold slide its way up her spine. It stole the breath from her lungs as she saw her breath turn into puffs of vapor. Then just as quickly as it came it left. It felt like they were caught in the ripples of a pond. The temperature around them plummeted then shot back up multiple times before the strange sensation vanished. She could suddenly breath again. Clarissa’s lungs burned as she greedily swallowed down fresh air. Jonas barely waited until he could speak before tearing his walkie talkie off his belt and spoke around gasps for air.

“Ren!-are--are you guys okay.” The walkie talkie was terrifyingly silent for a few moments.

“Uh, yeah, yeah. We’re fine I guess. What was that.” Jonas looked towards Clarissa. She shrugged. This didn’t change the plan, just made things a little more interesting.

“We don’t know. Keep your radios handy.” Jonas' face turned to stone as he clipped his walkie talkie back on his pants. His other hand removed his radio from his pocket. “You ready?”

Clarissa gave a slight smirk, her eyes clouds of anger and determination, as she removed her own radio. “Let's punch a ghost.”

…………………….

The bridge stand was well, still standing. Jonas was on edge. First he breaks down in front of Clarissa, which he wasn’t expecting tonight and then whatever the heck that feeling was. Jonas was about 2 seconds away from trying to kill a tree. He felt like he was being pulled in a hundred different directions while being boiled alive. He glanced back towards Clarissa. She either had a really good poker face or was just too angry to be scared. Jonas really envied her right now, her calm and collected attitude and most especially her belief that everything was going to work out. Jonas didn’t know what it was, but the feelings of hopelessness, dread, and grief were more prominent and painful now then they were when he first lost Alex. He only knew her for a day, but he really, really missed her.

Jonas climbed up a short ledge and turned to help Clarissa up when he heard it. “Yeah it doesn’t really look safe does it.” Jonas felt his hand go numb and his heart leap into his throat at the words. Clarissa’s shocked expression didn’t help. Jonas slowly turned around and saw Alex. It was Alex. But she was just standing there looking at the cable car.

“Alex?” Jonas could barely get his voice to work. Alex stood there a moment more and then turned to face them. Jonas could barely breathe. She looked exactly how he remembered her. Tears stung his eyes as he felt hope rage inside of him and then he choked on air as he realized what was wrong. Her mouth was moving but no words were coming out. And she looked pale, almost, see through. Jonas felt his heart seize and he fell to his knees trying to get his breathing under control. Specter Alex walked onto the bridge and knelt by the controls for the cable car before standing up and heading towards the shack to Jonas’ right. Jonas then noticed Clarissa's hand on his shoulder as she kneeled beside him.

“Its not her.” Clarissa squeezed his shoulder. Jonas felt something akin to shame. He couldn’t hold himself together longer than 2 minutes. He felt weak and useless.

“No it’s not.” Clarissa’s voice was gentle and it just made Jonas feel worse. “But, this means she is still here. And that we still have a chance. So lets get her back.” Clarissa stood and offered Jonas her hand. Jonas took it and let Clarissa help him up. The door to the shack flew open as ghost Alex tumbled out of it.

“The ghosts were messing with us here.” Jonas could feel Clarissa’s eyes on him. “Alex and I were heading to find Ren. when we went into the shack there they started screwing with us. They messed with the lights.” Jonas followed ghost Alex onto the bridge as she started messing with the control box again. Jonas watched her for a second before turning around and freezing solid. Clarissa was in the air being held up by what looked like a goth baymax. Then the realization kicked in when he stared into the blood red eyes. The ghosts. The shadowy form shifted and Clarissa was thrown to the ground. She hacked and coughed but regained her breath.

“Friggin ghosts.” Jonas couldn’t help but agree. 

_ “Hello.”  _ Jonas was seriously unnerved by this display from the ghosts. They had never been so present last time. They were just glimpses of red eyes and a shapeless mass for a split second before disappearing. But this, this was solid and imposing. It towered over them bearing into them with its red eyes.  _ “Welcome back.”  _ the ghosts could talk now?  _ “We saw you coming, thought we would say hello. Old friends?”  _ That was apparently the snapping point for Clarissa.

“Shut up you rotten excuse for a sock puppet, give us Alex.” Jonas almost laughed at the comparison. Almost. 

_ “You want Alex? Okay.”  _ the shape shifted and shrunk slowly gaining color, until… It was Alex. But solid this time. But something was still wrong. She was still too still. Her arms hung at her sides and her chest wasn’t moving. She wasn’t breathing. Then her eyes opened.

“What did you do to her?!” Clarissa was thankfully taking care of the speaking bit because Jonas couldn’t focus on anything but how Alex looked. She looked terrible. Her jeans were ripped in multiple places and soaked with water from the knees down. A small puddle formed underneath her feet. The red jacket that she was wearing was covered in dirt and mud, her shirt ripped in multiple places. Cuts lined the side of Alex’s face, too neat and precise to be an accident. The sight of blood staining the collar of her shirt, and the splotches of red scattered about her person made Jonas feel very very sick.

_ “The girl is strong, fierce, yet tempered.”  _ the voices laughed  _ “Alex isn’t here right now. Please leave a message after the beep.”  _ they laughed again. A deep echoing laugh that reverberated in Jonas’ mind. Alex’s figure doubled over as the unnatural sounding laughs racked her far too thin frame. She looked like she hadn't eaten in a very long while.

“You’re killing her.” Jonas could feel the anger and hate rolling off Clarissa in waves. He was too distraught to be angry. “All that talk about freedom and taking a host and you are killing her.” The voices snarled at that.

_ “The girl is strong, her will is that of a hundred souls. We are 97.”  _ the not Alex grinned and started towards Jonas and Clarissa.  _ “Soon the girl will be broken and we shall win.”  _ Not-Alex continues to stalk closer to them. Jonas couldn’t move. Not-Alex stopped centimeters from Jonas, so close their noses were almost touching. She stared up into Jonas’ face for a moment before speaking.  _ “How does it feel, to be so close,”  _ Not-Alex raised a hand and cupped Jonas’ face and he couldn’t breath.  _ “To be able to touch,”  _ Al-- Not-Alex smirked  _ “She will break, you will be too late to save her.”  _ Jonas felt his breath return at that moment and determination and anger flood his mind. He reached out to grab Not-Alex as her from began to walk away. And then everything went to heck. Not-Alex spun around and grabbed his wrist. 

_ “DO YOU WANT TO PLAY A GAME!!” _

The voices broke into Jonas' mind and left him numb as Clarissa screamed his name, as Not-Alex picked him up, and threw him over the side of the bridge.

………….

This was not how things were supposed to go. Clarissa could only watch as Jonas’ body went limp. And she could only scream his name as the ghosts used Alex to throw Jonas over the bridge.  _ “And another brother drowns. Are you even sure Alex would want to come back?”  _ then they vanished leaving Clarissa alone. She stood frozen for a moment before the terror caught up with her and she ran to the side of the bridge looking down. She couldn’t see Jonas. Cursing every god imaginable, Clarissa ripped off her shoes and tossed the walkie talkie and radio on her belt to the ground. She unclipped the buckles on her sand colored backpack holding the DeepGate and let it fall to the ground. Then without thinking about it too much, Clarissa jumped. The wind whipped at Clarissa’s hair as she fell. Her feet hit the water and she plummeted beneath the surface

The water was cold. Really cold. Clarissa forced her eyes open as her body began to shiver. The water was almost pitch black, she could feel currents pulling at her body and clothes. She desperately began to look around. Thankfully she did not have to look long. Jonas was slowly sinking just below her, unmoving. Clarissa clawed at the water and hooked hand into the back of Jonas’ jacket before using all the strength in her body to haul him back to the surface. She grasped at the soft ground beneath her fingers and dragged Jonas onto the beach. The beach? Clarissa almost took a moment to look around in shock. They were on a small beach that was most likely on the other side of the island. A short cliff face towered above them. Jonas’ unmoving body pulled her focus back to him. She immediately began CPR. pushing down hard on his chest she pleaded in silence for him to wake up. She heard something snap underneath her hands but she kept going. After a few more terrifying moments Jonas shot up and rolled onto his side water and bile flying out of his mouth as he took sky gasps of air. Clarissa didn’t think she would ever be able to go swimming again. “What, what happened.” Clarissa looked back down at Jonas who was holding onto her hand like a lifeline. 

“It doesn't matter right now. How are you feeling.” Jonas took a moment to respond, still disorientated.

“My chest hurts.” Clarissa winced

“Yeah I think one of your ribs is broken.” Jonas was silent at that for a moment before he started chuckling which turned into a grimace of pain. “Yeah definitely broken.” Clarissa shook her head at her own words. Just what they needed right now.

Clarissa let Jonas lay on the sand as she took the walkie talkie off of his belt and silently prayed for it to work. Thankfully it turned on without issue and she quickly contacted Ren and Nona. “Lovebirds you there?”

A moment later. “Yes, uh-uh, lovebirds here, just waiting, not doing anything else.” Clarissa rolled her eyes.

“I really don’t care if you two are making out and I don’t need to know.” Jonas gave a few quiet chuckles at that. “Are you two okay?”

“Yes we’re fine.” Nona’s voice came through the device. Apparently Ren lost privileges.

“Ok. Listen to me, you need to be careful. Jonas and I, we just got attacked.”

“YOU WHAT!!” Clarissa winced at Nona’s shout.

“Yes we got attacked, and yes we are okay. But we are somehow on the beach, I think we are on the other side of the island from Addler’s house. I need you two to stay where you are and stay far away from any ghosts, especially ones that look like Alex.” Seriously when the heck did she become a mother hen. Nona didn’t respond for a bit giving Clarissa time to check on Jonas who had fallen asleep. Seriously.

“Ok, we’ll be careful... Be safe Clarissa.” Nona’s voice was soft and worried coming over the walkie talkie.

“We will Nona.”

………….

Nona clipped the walkie talkie back onto her belt while Ren stared at her in abject horror. “Alex shaped ghosts?” Nona could only shrug. This night was already shaping out to be terrible, so much for a simple and easy rescue mission. At least no one was hurt, yet. Ren turned towards one of the windows overlooking the island; he grabbed a pair of binoculars he found and began to scan the island. Nona sighed internally, she could tell that Ren was far from okay with everything that was just said. She herself was far from okay. She was terrified, but she wanted to try and be strong. These events were too similar to what happened the last time they were on the island. Nona walked over to him and put her arm around him. He stiffened for a second and then relaxed. “I’m worried.” Nona didn’t respond just letting him say what he wanted too. “I mean, I just, I just hope everyone ends up being okay. Nona stood there silently for a moment.

“We’ll be okay Ren. we have a plan, it's just a little bump in the road.” it sounded like a lie. It probably was. Nona was beginning to regret agreeing to this plan. The thing is she thinks that Jonas and Clarissa would have gone ahead with it even if she didn’t agree. She probably could have gotten Ren to stay home. Nona lets her shoulders lump with an internal sigh as she rests her head against Ren’s shoulders. She feels Ren relax a little, but not much. She knows it's killing them both that Jonas and Clarissa are in trouble but they aren’t allowed to go find them to help. They have a plan, and if they are going to have any chance of making it through this they need to stick to it.

“Uh Nona,” the dread in Ren’s voice wormed its way into her thoughts. “Yo-you’ll want to see this.” Nona took the binoculars from shaking hands. “Just look out at the gate in the fence.” Nona looked through the binoculars and found a figure. They appeared to be made out of pure shadow with the only color coming from two red glowing eyes. After studying the figure for a moment through the binoculars Nona was able to tell that it resembled a girl, with a ponytail and large jacket. That when she noticed it was staring right at her. A moment later the figure stepped forward passing through the chain link fence before starting its way towards them.

“Ren lock the doors.” Nona was answered with silence and she turned around to see Ren holding his head in his hands “Ren please.” Nona could no longer keep the desperation, and fear from her voice. Thankfully it seemed to spur Ren into action. Nona started checking the windows and made sure everything was locked tight before pulling out her radio. Her hands were shaking. She was freaking terrified. Nona felt Ren take one of her hands with his as she let her feelings show through her tears. Ren wasn’t much better. The nightmares and memories paled in comparison to what they were facing now. Ren opened his mouth to say something when a loud thud sounded from the door. Ren jumped and let out what sounded like a swear but Nona couldn’t tell over the sound of her own heartbeat. A few more thuds sounded from the door. The lights in the room flickered in time with the thuds. Nona swallowed down a scream. The thuds then stopped but the lights dimmed and then flickered out. A face appeared in the window. It was a dripping inky black, the red eyes burned with barely concealed hatred. It looked, it looked like Alex. Nona held Ren’s hand in a death grip as the figure began to beat against the windows and claw at the edges searching for a way in. Nona only hoped that they could keep it distracted long enough for Clarissa and Jonas to get to the station. It was then when a voice that sounded almost exactly like their late friend came through on the handheld radios.

_ “Do You Want To Play A Game!” _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed the chapter the next one is coming soon. I am looking for a good last name for Jonas's dad and Alex's mom. if you have any suggestions go ahead and leave them below. Thanks for reading!


	6. Showdown Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final countdown
> 
> *off key kazoo choir*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone welcome to another chapter. I have been able to put a lot of work into my outline for this story and now have a general idea of how long it will be. We are looking at 4 main parts probably around 25-30 chapters. This is the second to last chapter of part 1. I am really glad that you are enjoying the story.

Clarissa was far beyond angry. Sitting on the beach next to a passed out Jonas, Clarissa could feel her spite and hatred for the ghosts like it was a thick lava slowly encompassing her. Jonas had passed out just a couple minutes ago while she was talking to Nona and Ren over the walkie talkie. She didn’t call them again, worried she might snap at them because of how angry she was. Jonas and herself were somehow on the opposite end of the island. They had one working walkie talkie, 2 water logged radios, oh and she was missing her shoes, not to mention the DeepGate which was vital for the plan to work. So yeah she was beyond angry. Hopefully the ghosts didn’t realize what was in the backpack and left it alone. Clarissa felt confident that the DeepGate could survive a quick soak but she really didn’t want to test it. She was grateful for the few minutes to collect herself. Though there was one thought that wouldn’t leave her alone. Specifically it was about the way the ghosts were acting. Last time they wanted to possess and take all of them. But now, they just wanted Alex. They tried to kill Jonas, granted they didn’t try very hard, but still. It just didn’t make sense. Something was different about the ghosts, they were smarter, less childish, it almost seemed like they were taking pleasure in hurting them, and in hurting Alex. It just didn’t make sense, before they were driven solely by anger and desperation. But now it seemed like they were...well, smart. Clarissa glanced at Jonas. He looked.. Peaceful.

After a couple more minutes Clarissa leaned over and shook Jonas. Thankfully Jonas woke up easily. “How long was I out?”

“A few minutes. Now come on sleepy head we have to find our way back to the station.” Jonas looked confused for a moment. “Take a look around Jonas.” He obeyed and Clarissa could see the shock and alarm that took over his features.

“How did we end up out here?” Jonas rubbed his eyes and blinked before pinching himself.

“You aren’t imagining anything, we’re actually on the beach. And to answer your question, ghosts.” Clarissa stood up her soaking wet clothes shifting and sending tingles down her spine from the cold. Aren’t summer nights supposed to be warm? Clarissa offered Jonas a hand up and they both started walking along the beach looking for a trail or path to take up the cliffside and back towards the innards of the island. Neither one of them spoke for a few minutes, too busy looking for a way off the beach in the dark.

“Thank you,” Jonas’ words cut through the silence that sat between them. “For saving my life I mean.” Clarissa didn’t respond, just nodded to let Jonas know she heard him. The entire situation was just a convoluted mess. What was with everyone and drowning. Michael drowned, the ghosts made it feel like she was drowning when she had been possessed, and now Jonas had almost drowned. Couldn’t they catch at least once break. And now that she thought about it, there was one vague memory of Ren falling off the same bridge that original night from hell. Clarissa let out a sigh. She was going to kill those ghosts. “Where are your shoes?”

“Back on the bridge with everything else.” Clarissa heard Jonas struggling to maintain his laughter, which quickly turned into coughs and deep breaths of pain. “Try not to over exert yourself there, idiot.” Clarissa could feel the glare leveled at the back of her head. It was almost enough to bring a smile to her face, almost. After about half an hour of searching Clarissa found a path leading up back into the woods. Carefully avoiding sharp rocks and anything else that could shred her feet Clarissa led the way back through the forest towards the Bridge. Of course nothing could be that easy though could it.

They heard her before they could see her. Clarissa felt anger boil inside her. It wasn’t enough that they took Alex but now they are using her body to taunt them. The specter came into view walking quickly on the path. Its voice sounded distant like someone was speaking underwater. Clarissa couldn’t make out what it was saying but she could tell that it was happily jabbering to something. Jonas stood frozen beside her watching the specter with a heartbroken expression. “Come on Jonas we need to keep moving...Jonas.” Jonas broke from his stupor and looked over at Clarissa.

“Do you think that’s actually her.” Clarissa groaned internally. Why couldn’t they just all stay focused.

“No I don’t, I think it's the friggin ghost messing with us again. Remember they almost killed you about an hour ago.” Jonas winced at that thought before turning back towards the specter. It has stopped a few feet in front of them talking to someone or something they still couldn’t see. Clarissa wanted to scream and she almost did when Jonas started reaching out towards the specter. “Jonas, stop.” Jonas ignored her and instead quickly stepped forward and reached out to grab the shoulder of the ghost. But instead of his hand just passing through its arm, it connected. The specter glitched and began to almost vibrate as it fast forwarded through different movements, glitching and shaking staying in the same spot but moving too fast to understand what was happening. The voice no longer sounded distant or muffled, snippets of conversation caught from the flood of voices, all Alex’s. With terrifying speed the casual movements quickly became stumbles, screams of pain, snaps that sounded like broken bones, blood falling from the figures mouth, trembling shoulders and hands. Clarissa clamped her hands over her ears to keep the sounds out. It was horrible to listen too. Clarissa then realized that the specter once completely see through was now starting to look solid. She quickly jumped forward and dragged Jonas away from the violently spasming ghost. The sounds of breaking bones and pleas for mercy made her feel sick, and then very, very, angry. Jonas looked like he was going to keel over. The onslaught of sound and horrific images continued for a few minutes more. When finally, it all stopped leaving a very life like Alex, laying on the ground, covered in mud and blood. Jonas tore himself from Clarissa’s grip and rushed over the...Alex’s side. He carefully picked her up and held her in his lap trying to wake her up. After a few moments Alex shifted and her eyes began to flicker.

“Alex?” Jonas quietly called her name not believing what was in front of him. Alex slowly opened her eyes after a moment her gaze found Jonas and she flinched violently. Tears rolled down Alex's face and her breath turned into strangled sobs. Then the pleas started and Jonas couldn’t move.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, please.” Alex curled into herself, sheltering her neck and head. “Please, stop. I’ll do whatever you want , please stop hurting me.” Clarissa felt her stomach drop and a few tears sting her eyes. This wasn’t Alex. Alex was sassy, strong, unconquerable. This Alex was broken, shattered even. It sounded like she had lost her will to live. Jonas sat frozen and could do nothing to comfort his sister laying on the ground in front of him suffering. After a moment he tried to reach out and hold Alex's shoulder, but his hand passed right through her figure. The sobs and pleas began to fade and her form once again turned transparent before vanishing. Clarissa slowly walked up beside Jonas. The tears on his face told her everything she needed to know.

“Come on Jonas. We need to go.” Jonas looked up at her lost. Clarissa’s grief for her friends turned to anger. “Listen to me right now Jonas, you did not hurt her. The ghosts did. Now we are here to get her back, to get her away from everything that is happening on this island. But I can’t do that unless you get your head in the game and help me. So get up off your butt and help me out.” Clarissa took a deep breath. “We have some ghosts to take revenge on so get up.” Jonas met her eyes and she could see the determination take root, and perhaps a hint of anger. Good. Jonas got to his feet and wiped the tear streaks off of his face. He nodded once to Clarissa. Clarissa took that as her que and led them towards the bridge.

…………………….

Ren was exhausted, terrified and fearing for his life, but mainly exhausted. The ghost Alex thing had been trying to get into the tower for almost an hour now. It tried beating down the door and windows but only managed to put a small crack in one of the windows. Thankfully it seemed the ghost did not have super strength. After its failed attempt at the doors and windows, it tried convincing them to let it in, using Alex’s voice which was terrifying. And after that failed it started using threats and general creepy ghosts stuff. Flickering lights, voices from the radio, chills and cold shivers down his neck and spine. It was not a pleasant experience. Currently the ghost was shaking the tower somehow. The tremors made it hard to keep his balance but thankfully it didn’t seem anything was in danger of falling over on them. He and Nona were crouched under a desk with the power barely working, it was freezing cold up in the tower and he and Nona were cuddled together for warmth. Normally he would be in a state of bliss. Cuddling with his girlfriend, just enjoying being with her, especially after spending all year at different schools. Yeah pure bliss. But being besieged in a tower that he was beginning to question the structural integrity of, by a ghost using the body of his dead friend. Not bliss, totally not bliss.

Ren could feel Nona shiver beside him and he tried to squeeze closer to her. When the ghost had first attacked Nona had broken down, guess she was terrified as well, Ren wasn’t doing any better . But he tried to be just a little stronger for Nona. She had been holding him together so he could try to do the same for her. Sitting under the desk, Ren wondered if they were just gonna break together. They had attempted to use the radios to get the ghost to leave and it had been working. In fact the radios seemed to cause the ghost actual pain. But seeing Alex, or at least her body, in tears from pain quickly broke Ren’s resolve to use the radios to fight back. So far hiding under the desk was working. Ren could feel them both trembling. The shaking somehow intensified and the generator began to tip and rattle. The resulting thud of the heavy device shattering against the ground tore a scream of surprise from the both of them. The sound of laughter followed soon afterwards. But somehow the power stayed on. The lights still flickered and the radio began to spout noise.

_ “Come out friends.”  _ And the ghosts were talking again. . . great.  _ “Like rats, caught in a trap. No way out. Leave. Is. not. Possible.''  _ The laughter started again. Echoing around the room and inside his head. If he got out of this he was going to become a monk, maybe. Probably not. In that moment of deliberation of his future religious status, Ren noticed something. The static from the radio was changing and the laughter had stopped. Ren peeked out from under the desk as the rattling subsided and the lights stopped flickering. The radio was...well, it looked like it was fighting itself. The dial spun back and forth, stopping only for a moment before jumping again. Ren nudged Nona to break her from her stupor.

“Nona look at this.” Ren stood up from under the desk and walked over to the radio. It was glowing purple, but one moment it seemed more red the next more blue. Ren glanced around and saw that the ghost was gone.

“What's happening,” Nona leaned in to look at the radio as she whispered. The sudden silence compared to a minute ago felt terrible to break.

“I don’t know. But I have a stupid idea.” Ren was oddly feeling really good right now. He was still scared and he could feel the tear tracks on his face but he felt comfortable, for some reason. 

“Stupid ideas my favorite.” Ren could hear the lightness to Nona’s voice. What was happening. A moment ago he felt like they were going to die but now he feels just fine, peaceful in fact. “What's happening? I feel weird.” so Nona noticed it too. Good to know. At that moment the radio shut down, sending sparks flying. Hopefully they could still accept the bunker call with all the damage to the tower.

“I don’t know, but I feel it too. The weird feeling I mean.” silence ensued for a moment and Nona looked to be on the verge of laughing at him. Ren opened his mouth to tease Nona when he heard a soft sound coming from his pocket. They both froze and Ren dug into his pocket and pulled out... his radio. It was his radio but the display was glowing blue. The glow slowly pulsated like a heartbeat, but the radio was silent. “Hello?” Ren didn’t know what he was expecting but it definitely wasn’t that terrifying static filled voice the ghosts always used, sounding so...soft.

_ “Hello?” _

……………………..

_ The darkness was cold, and lonely. She wasn’t alone, but she was lonely. The darkness was small, not much space, also very wet. The other voices were-are here. They seemed older, more experienced, more collected.  _

_ Her thoughts, memories are-were frazzled, segmented, broken. She remembers lights, smells, a life.  _

_ Then moments of trees, starry sky, red glow; green jacket with a red beanie accompanied by trepidation and nerves; more faces fading.  _

_ She remembers fear and grief, alone… so very alone.  _

  
  


_ Then the glow resets and the moments happen again, and again, and again.  _

  
  


_ Then comes the pain.  _

  
  


_ The agony.  _

  
  


_ No rest, no release of endless pain and agony.  _

  
  


_ Fear and darkness, _

  
  
  
  


_ alone.  _

  
  
  


_ The glow invades and breaks, claws and needles tear and break.  _

_ Empty, alone, forgotten.  _

_ No more lights.  _

_ She wanders the space, the darkness. Empty unfeeling, the thoughts the memories fading-faded like a dream. Then she hears the scream, she looks. Red hair, short. Anger, pain rolls off in waves. She feels sympathy. The tall one goes over the edge, red hair jumps after it. The others try to force them down, drag them down. The others feel glee laugh as they drown. She doesn’t agree, pulls them away, hides them from the others. The others scream, they don’t know she interfered. That's okay. Then the other two. Holding hands loving gazes. She feels lonely, she watches. The others find them, terrorize them. She feels anger and hate, “ThEY ARe JUST CHIlDREN, pLEASE.” the others scream at her, they hurt her. Pain and agony boil to the surface. She hides, lets the pain subside. The lovers are crying, hiding. Like her. She is angry. She attacks the others, tears into them. 1 against 97, lonely but not alone, surrounded by others. The others evil, hate and pain. She fights, she wins. Then the voice, simple, inquiring, familiar. She wants to speak, she finds she can. The box, she has a voice, she speaks. _

  
  


……………………

_ “Hello?” _

Nona would forever deny the fact that she nearly screamed when the voice came through the radio. She just wasn’t expecting it okay. The ghosts had been tormenting them for the past hour and all of a sudden they were being nice. It didn’t make sense. Ren gave her a weird look and she glared back at him. Ren contained a grin and turned back to the radio. 

“Um, hi...I’m Ren.” Nona raised an eyebrow and leaned forward to stare Ren down.

“Really, ‘hi, I'm Ren’ is the best you can think of to say.” Ren opened his mouth to respond but they were cut off by laughter. But this wasn’t the “prepare to die” laugh the ghosts seemed to have, it sounded normal like someone laughing at a funny joke, except for the static part.

“So uh, who is this?” Nona wanted to bang her head against the wall. It seems social skills still wasn’t something Ren hadn’t picked up despite being almost twenty years old.

_ “Who?” _ Okay, that was new. The voice almost sounded sad.  _ “I am-was she. Not. The. others.”  _ The voice definitely sounded sad, or heartbroken. Nona was so very confused. First the ghosts were messing with them without the gate being open, then they were way smarter and ruthless, and now...now they were heartbroken? That same weird feeling still permeated the air and only added to Nona’s confusion. The air seemed alive, the temperature was changing with the voice, or its emotions? Maybe?  _ “Is. Leave. Possible.”  _ so that was the same. But the voice sounded wistful, not angry or desperate like the last time. It was all just so confusing.

“Uh...i hope so.” Nona smacked Ren. “what was that for?”

“Maybe we should try to not tell the evil ghosts our plan.” Ren tried to reply but was again cut off by quiet laughter from the ghost. But it was different this time. The static was fading, and the voice sounded..it sounded like-

“Alex?” The laughter cut off sharply and silence seized the room.

_ “Alex?....Alex.”  _ that was Alex’s voice, but she was saying the name like it was something completely foreign to her. Like she didn’t remember who she was. Nona wiped away the tears that were forming in her eyes. Ren stood frozen letting his own tears drip off of his chin. Nona put one arm around him and looked at the slowly pulsating radio. She just now realized the blue was the exact same shade that Alex’s hair had been.

“Yeah, Alex...she’s our friend.” Nona didn’t know what she was saying she was just letting whatever came to mind first out of her mouth. “We, uh… we came looking for her.” Nona let silence envelope the room for a minute, trying to think of what to say.

_ “She was..important to you… a friend.”  _ Nona’s heart broke as the reality set in that if this was Alex, she didn’t exist anymore. She was gone.

“Yeah, she was really important. She really helped us, saved our lives.” Nona was now transfixed by the blue light. “Do you know what happened to our friends?” Nona hoped that Jonas and Clarissa were okay, if they had been attacked even half as violently as they had been...Nona didn’t like the possibilities. 

_ “Tall one, red hair....safe hidden from view. Hurt but safe. The others were not kind.”  _ That was the other thing Alex wasn’t totally like the ghosts were last time. She seemed independent. Nona was guessing that the others were the other ghosts. Nona thought for a moment, it seemed that ghost Alex was content to wait. She started humming some song, that sounded familiar but Nona couldn’t tell from where. She took a quick look at the radio station; 88.6. Maybe they could get ghost alex to say something to prove who or what she is.

“What, what do you remember?” Hopefully she would say something that they could identify.

_ “Faces, lights, all faded...fear, grief, sorrow… acceptance, darkness over and over again. Pain, loss, alone. All alone. Forgotten, abandoned”  _ the temperature dropped and Nona shivered from the cold. She felt a chill and electricity crawl up her spine. The pain in the voice was so thick she felt like she should be able to reach out and touch it.  _ “IS. LEAVE. POSSIBLE.”  _ Nona didn’t know what to say to that. She wanted to cry for whoever this voice was, for whoever was in this much pain. It couldn’t be Alex, it sounded ancient, timeless.  _ “All alone, all alone.”  _ it sounded just like Alex, but it couldn’t be. They didn’t abandon her, they never would.

“Your name is Alex.” Nona jumped when she heard Ren speak next to her. Then her heart dropped as the light from the radio faltered and then flashed brightly. Instead of pulsating it was now a steady strong light. “Your name is Alex,” Ren was almost sobbing “Please remember, we want you back Alex.” the voice was silent but the air around them swirled around them and moved back and forth across the room.

_ “Alex....I am Alex.” _

_ …………….. _

_ “Alex....I am Alex.” she had a name, a name. Memories rushed back the lights, she could feel the lights again. Then the pain, the agony, the darkness. Then the others came. _

_ “It is a lie, you are one of us. You are not Alex. you do not exist.” the pain was unbearable, the memories of decades of repeated time caving in through her skull. It felt like the entire world was crashing down into her mind, and the claws the needles tore and broke and shattered her. _

_ “MY NAME IS ALEX!!!” the scream echoed through her mind and the darkness. The others answered back the glow tore into her, gutting her and cutting her open. Dark liquid flowed through her fingers, and up her throat and out her mouth. _

_ “YOU ARE NOT!!” _

_ …………………….. _

Nona had no clue what was happening. The light emanating from the radio was almost unbearably bright. Blue then red, blue then red. Back and forth the dial spun, it jumped between almost every station flashing colors and lights. Screams and shouts echoed through the room pouring out of the handheld radio, and then the towers radio, and then the speakers systems. The entire island was screaming with echoes of Alex’s voice and the voice of the sunken. The lights across the island flashed like strobe lights. Some blue, some red, all playing conversations, notes of a song, and screams of pain and terror from decades of time crammed into the space of 2 years. Nona held her hand over her ears trying to block the onslaught. Finally after what seemed like days the sounds stopped. Nona found herself on the floor covered in sweat and unable to hold her hands still. The handheld radio pulsed blue a few more times.

_ “You will not find them.”  _ that was Alex again.

_ “They will die.”  _ and that was the sunken. The radio pulsed brightly one last time before shutting off. The deafening silence swallowed the sound of their breathing and was then broken by an angry voice hiding terror crackling over her walkie talkie.

“What did you two do!?”

……………

Jonas was not having a good time. He was soaked and freezing cold, his chest felt like he had been buried alive under a stack of boulders, and then the entire island became a disco screamo party. They had just reached the bridge again after a couple of hours of hiking through the woods when the show had started. They were only able to cover their ears and pray for it to stop. Jonas’ head was still ringing like a tuba...that wasn’t right.

“What did you two do!?” Clarissa’s shout only served to aggravate Jonas’ headache and he laid down on the ground hoping the headache would stop. Jonas didn’t pay much attention to the following conversation, it felt like he was swimming in syrup. Jonas stayed like that for a few minutes before Clarissa walked over.

“How are you feeling.” Clarissa chuckled at Jonas’ question. 

“I should be asking you that. You look like your head is about to explode.” Jonas shrugged and looked up at Clarissa. She had her backpack over her shoulder and was looking at Jonas with something in her gaze that he couldn’t quite place.

“Do I have something on my face? You’re looking at me kind of weird.” When Clarissa didn’t answer he looked up at her and saw worry on her face. “What?” Jonas felt mildly uncomfortable, did he have something on his face. Clarissa after another moment sighed and sat down next to him.

“Nona said she and Ren spoke to Alex. The real Alex” Jonas bolted upright. His mouth hung open as he tried to find what to say. Clarissa cut him off before he could say anything. “From what I understand it didn’t go well.” Jonas shut his mouth. “They said that she didn’t remember who she was. She was apparently just like the ghosts last time we were here, just nicer.” Clarissa let out a heavy sigh. “They aren’t a hundred percent sure, but they do think it was Alex.” Jonas was silent. He didn’t know what to think. Doubt and fear began to eat at him. Was he trying to save someone who was already dead? Maybe but he still had to try, he had to know for sure. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself otherwise.

“Okay,” Jonas’ voice shook more than he would have liked. “I still have to do this.” Clarissa looked relieved and nodded.

“Alright then, let’s get this over with.” Clarissa stood up and offered Jonas a hand up. “How are your ribs holding up?” Jonas chuckled.

“Feels like crap but I'm okay.” Jonas was going to owe Clarissa majorly after all of this was over. She kept him from drowning and walked across the entire island without shoes. “Is the deepgate still intact?”

“Thankfully it was untouched, now hurry up.” Jonas chuckled and he and Clarissa quickly made their way up to the station. They unlocked the door using some bolt cutters and quickly located the machine they used the last time to send the signal. Clarissa quickly unclipped her reacquired walkie talkie from her belt. “Nona we’re at the station, you guys ready?”

“Roger, Roger.” there was a sharp sound as Nona most likely slapped Ren.

“Yes we’re ready. Once you guys send the signal we’ll accept it and meet you outside of the bunker. Try to get here in one piece please.” Clarissa rolled her eyes before nodding at Jonas. With a deep breath he pushed the button.

‘Signal sent... signal verified, emergency bunker is now open.’

…………….

_ Anger, uncontrollable anger coursed through the darkness, every atom and particle shot like bullets, lethal, unstoppable, without mercy. Every last piece intent on causing agony to a single entity within the darkness. The very world crashing in without remorse. _

_ So close. So close to winning, scaring them off, getting rid of them. But SHE had to interfere. Sleepy time gal, angry but tempered, strong but broken. Was-is-will supposed to be broken. They were coming. All their plans in ruins, their victory, their freedom just out of reach. She will pay. _

_. _

_. _

_. _

_ Alex, my name is Alex. Another wave of agony swept over her. She didn’t know where the name came from, she forgot but she had it and she refused to let it go again. The name brought memories, some good some bad, but it also brought pain, unbearable pain. The dark liquid pooled around her. She could feel hard cold stone beneath her knees, the cut in her abdomen kept bleeding and bleeding, a torrent of dark liquid squeezed through her fingers, some leaked from the corners of her mouth. Breathing was nearly impossible. Gasps and chokes signified the working of her lungs, and pain, so much pain. Was it ever going to end. The drowning sensation that seized her body told her no. Tears too dark to just be water leaked from her eyes. There were no lights here, only darkness and pain. Where are the lights, wHERE ARE ThE LIGHTS, WHERE ARE THEy!! All she wanted was to see the lights again. That phrase came to her again. Is. Leave. Possible. _

……………….

The mouth of the bunker seemed to echo with nightmares. Jonas was pretty sure it was just his imagination but it was still terrifying. 

“Are we all clear on the plan?” Clarissa stared them all down and Jonas wondered when he forgot that Clarissa was terrifying.

“Yep! We all go down together, I open the gate while Jonas and Nona keep their radios ready to go. You set up the deep gate and when we find Alex we lock onto her ‘signal’ as you said to pull her out. And I won’t ask how it works because we don’t have a week for you to explain it.” Nona smacked Ren in the back of the head as he snickered. Jonas gave a weak smile to his friends, he was too nervous to manage anything else. Far too nervous.

“Any questions, bathroom breaks, or random nonsense needs to be let out now.” Clarissa once again stared them all down and Jonas was glad they were friends and not enemies. “Alright good now let’s go.” Clarissa started towards the bunker door but stopped once she realized No one else had moved. “What is it?” Jonas winced a little at her angry tone of voice. But he wasn’t sure how to vocalize what he was thinking.

“What do we do if she is gone?” Apparently Nona did. The look of frustration and anger on Clarissa’s face made him feel horrible, how is he supposed to admit that he is too terrified to move? Clarissa stared at all of them but instead of exploding she took a deep breath and walked up to them. She got close and pulled all of them into a hug. Jonas was more than a little shocked but returned the hug once he felt Nona do the same.

Jonas almost didn’t hear her speak. “I know you guys are scared… I am too. But if we don’t do this. If we walk away now we will regret it for the rest of our lives. If there is any chance that Alex is still alive, if she is still there then I have to try.” Clariss broke the hug and looked them in the eyes. “You don’t have to come, but I am going.” and she did just that. Clarissa turned and walked into the bunker without a second look back. Jonas took a deep breath and followed, he heard Nona and Ren move behind him. With shaky breaths Jonas plunged into the darkness.

………….

_ The girl was in pain, she was suffering but she would not give up her name. They had been so close, she had been on the verge of fading away, fading into nothing, and those idiots gave her the name. They poured everything they had into making the girl suffer. Her body would most likely be mutilated but they no longer cared, they would have her or she would die and they would take the next child who played with the waves. _

_ A presence broke the ghosts from their crusade. The girl collapsed into a pool of her own blood, the sobs unable to leave her throat. The other four, the girl’s friends were close, very very close. They wanted the girl because she was strong, but she is too strong. They will take or kill the others. Yes take or kill. They will live again, whatever the cost. _

_ …………….. _

The cave was just as dark and cold as Jonas remembered it. The glass looking walls, the massive glowing lake, and the little pale yellow triangle floating in the air out in the middle of the lake. He really hated this place. Then he realized that this was the first time the others had been in here. Well Clarissa had been in here but she was possessed at the time so he doesn’t know if that counts. Clarissa was kneeling on the ground in front of the lake setting up her device. There were three main parts, connected by wires forming a semicircle with the open side facing the lake. The two side parts looked a lot like speakers while the main section looked like a big radio. She glanced up to look at them for just a moment before focusing back on her device. They all took out their radios and spaced out in the cavern.

“So can I ask how this works.” Clarissa gave Ren a bored glare. In response Ren just shrugged.

“Simply put, you three are going to be aggravating the ghosts, which won’t be hard for you Ren, while I look for Alex.” Ren looked offended by Clarissa’s comment but decided to let it go in favor of asking more questions.

“Okay, but how will you look for her. The ghosts don’t show up unless they want to.” Clarissa let out a heavy sigh and looked like she was about ten second from killing Ren.

“The idea is that the ghosts have a specific frequency that affects them depending where we are on the island. My hope is that Alex has her own frequency. If I find that frequency I can find Alex. From there we’ll see what happens.” Clarissa paused. “Once we start no questions until we close the gate.”

“Try 88.6. When we talked to Alex earlier that was the station.” Clarissa nodded to Nona and flicked the switch on the device. It powered up and a steady slow beeping resonated in the cave.

“Showtime Ren.” Ren gave a thumbs up to Clarissa and he started to turn his dial. That cursed humming sound soon followed as the triangle began to vibrate and shake a red line extending from its tip traveling down to create another triangle, then two lines from that triangle formed and reached out to complete the rift. The humming grew louder until it was deafening. The final triangle slowly formed. Then it completed and the screams started. “Keep them busy!!”

The entire world around Jonas shook with the force of a hurricane. Jonas barely kept from falling nearly dropping his radio as well. And then the ghosts stepped out. Before the ghosts were nothing more than two red eyes floating in the air with T.V. static forming a vague idea of their bodies. These ghosts were solid black shifting masses of black shadows marbled with white veins, strands of shadow reached out from their masses like tentacles. Jonas felt his mouth go dry and his knees begin to shake. He dimly registered Ren shouting before the Ghost started moving towards him. Running on adrenaline and fear he spun the dial on his radio frantically searching for the right frequency. A ghost charged him, screams echoing from its form. When it was just a few inches from his face his radio light up red and the ghost backpedaled screeching before it lost its shape and fading into the ground. Then another ghost stepped out from the portal, and another, and one followed behind that. And they all began charging.

………………

“Keep them busy!!” Clarissa doubted anyone heard her over the screams. She certainly wasn’t expecting those when she planned this. She quickly turned the dial on her handheld radio searching for any sign of Alex. She saw from the corner of her eye, the first ghost stopped inches from Jonas before fading away. But she remained focused. She carefully searched through the frequencies listening closely. She couldn’t afford to move too fast and miss her on the first run. She slowly cranked the dial and when she reached 88.6 the display lit up a bright blue. She held the radio to her ear straining for any sounds that would tell her if Alex was there. She saw the ghosts chagrin and fading away as her three friends frantically spun their dials. She also saw the terror on their faces. Finally over the screams of the ghosts she heard choked sobs coming from her device. Got her.

Clarissa wasted no time in wondering why Alex was crying, she only knew the ghosts didn’t have empathetic or sensitive goo in their ghostly bodies. So this had to be Alex. Clarissa turned to her device and quickly dialed it into 88.6. In the center of the three nodes on her device a triangle formed then as the other two ends dialed in one triangle spread to three before she had a smaller portal in front of her. I looked like shattered glass with nothing but black behind it. “We’re almost done. Just keep them busy.” and without hesitation Clarissa jumped into the black.

………

_ It was cold, really really cold. Her fingers felt like ice, her leg and hands numb. It felt like she would never be warm again. Clarissa felt like she was underwater. She could feel something solid under her feet and could move normally but breathing was difficult to put it nicely. Behind her the portal gave off a bright white glow thankfully that would make it easy to find. Clarissa moved through the darkness looking for any sign of her friend. At least she considered her a friend. Clarissa couldn’t count how long she had been wandering. There was no way to tell. The portal however slowly got smaller but was still easy to see so she couldn’t get lost in here. Clarissa stopped for a moment to listen for anything to give her a direction to go. _

  
  


_ Silence _

  
  
  


_ More silence _

  
  
  


_ Even more silence _

  
  


_ Then she heard creaking, it sounded like when she put something in the hydraulic press in her classroom right before it broke _

  
  


_ Clarissa hurried towards the noise peering through the black that was now becoming steel corridors with pipes along the walls and edges. Memories and images began to flash through her mind. The sensation of the ghosts under her skin was one she still remembered well. She did not enjoy its return. As she continued to walk through the steel halls, more images flashed across her mind, but they weren’t hers. She saw Jonas his hand clamped tightly around her wrist? No. Not hers. Whatever she was seeing they weren’t her memories. She watched as Jonas bruised the person’s wrist. She was beginning to think she knew whose memories she was seeing. The sight made her sick. She saw Ren and Nona, heard some frankly terrible things from their mouths. As the images continued they became stronger until she could feel and hear everything that occurred in them. Almost like she was the one now living them. She saw herself and felt guilt wash over her at the words that came from her mouth and a slap that stung her cheek through the memory. Then she saw Michael. She felt the relief and disbelief that accompanied the memory, then she felt that relief turn to pain and agony as she was choked and her wrist snapped. Clarissa knew exactly whose memories these were, tears rolled down Clarissa’s cheek at the phantom pains radiating through the images. She had to find her. She had to. And in a back room in a corner she finally found her. Clarissa was going to be sick. Alex was curled into a ball laying on her side, there was far too much red around her. Clarissa got closer and saw the gaping wounds in Alex’s stomach and on her arms and legs. Blood leaked from her mouth and her clothes were almost completely stained the dark color. _

_ “Alex, wake up.” Clarissa knelt down in front of Alex. She couldn’t see very well in the dimly lit setting but she could see enough. “Come on, Alex it's time to come home.” _

_ “Is that my name?” Clarissa frowned. Alex's voice was filled with static. _

_ “Yes it is. My name is Clarissa.” Clarissa paused wondering if this was the right thing to ask “Do you remember me.” Alex didn’t respond at first, just silently laying there. _

_ “Yes, and no.” Alex reacted then moving her hands from her stomach to her head. “Too many memories, same but different, over and over and over.” Alex then looked Clarissa in the eye “Is. Leave. Possible.” Alex’s voice was her own in that moment and she sounded broken, lost, desperate.  _

_ “Yes, Alex it is. Please come with me.” Clarissa extended her hand towards Alex. She laid there staring up at her grief locked in her face. “Please Alex. Come back.” Clarissa could feel the tears rolling down her cheeks, she was so close, dang it. She just needed Alex to come back with her. The anger, the grief, the months and years of disbelief, of terror and guilt crashed down in that moment and Clarissa let the tears fall. And finally Alex reached up and took Clarissa’s hand. Clarissa pulled Alex to her feet and slung her arm across her shoulders. The relief inside her felt better then anything she could imagine. The walk back to the portal was quick, the ghosts still preoccupied with her friends. She stepped up to the glowing portal with a deep breath guided Alex through. _

……………...

The ghosts were relentless. As soon as one died or whatever happened to it another one was right behind it. What was frustrating is that each one seemed to react to a different station. Se they were left constantly spinning the dials hoping to get lucky. So far it was working. It had been about five minutes since Clarissa had jumped through the mini portal she had made which was terrifying. Jonas really didn’t know if they could keep this up any longer. A tentacle whipped by just above Jonas’ head as he banished or killed the ghost it was connected to. Another was right behind it and Jonas gave it the same outcome. That was when a bright flash nearly blinded him and he heard Clarissa yell.

“CLOSE THE GATE!!” Somehow the screaming ghosts got even louder.

_ “NOOOOO!!”  _ The ghosts all charged with a vengeance too many to stop but just before they reached them a ringing broke through the noise and all the ghosts began to glitch around the cave and lose their form. The multitude of screams was replaced by a single one. A voice he hadn’t heard in a long time. Jonas spun towards Clarissa to see Alex cradled in her arms drenched in red. Jonas nearly threw up.

“Focus on the giant gate nitwits.” The ringing which had been fading returned in full force and Clarissa held Alex still as she began to flinch and tremble, screams and sobs tumbling from her throat. Jonas turned towards the gate unable to watch his sister in agony. A single triangle had formed in the middle of the gate and from it twelve separate tendrils branched out to form their own triangles at their end. The ringing changed pitch and the ghosts vanished reappearing on the other side of the rift. The final lines connected and with a final mind shattering scream it disappeared. The resulting silence was broken only by the sobs and strangled breaths of Alex who was still lying in Clarissa’s arms. Jonas turned back to Alex and promptly lost what little was in his stomach. Blood stained every inch of Alex’s clothes, leaking from the corners of her mouth, he.. It just...he couldn’t think. Jonas stumbled over to Alex’s side. He heard Nona gasp and Ren choke on air as they both saw. He looked at Clarissa and saw tears rolling down her face as she watched Alex struggle to breath.

“J-Jonas?” Jonas looked down at Alex who was looking up at him eyes wide.

“Yeah, yeah it's me. I'm right here Alex. I’m right here.” Jonas couldn’t keep the emotion out of his voice. His throat felt clogged as he held Alex’s hand and took her into his lap. Alex looked up at Ren and Nona as they sat down next to them.

“He-.” her attempt to speak was cut off by a strangled cough and breath, after a few terrifying moments, Alex coughed up a new wave of blood. “H-hey guys.” Ren couldn't speak. He took Nona’s hand and rested the other on Alex’s shoulder. “I remember now. I missed you guys” Alex struggled to speak through the blood in her mouth. “Thank you Clarissa, I- i just.”

“It's okay, you are going to be okay.” Clarissa was fully crying, her voice however remained firm determination glinting in her eyes. Alex gave her a smile before another cough racked her body and she began to tremble, and then violently shake. Jonas held her tightly as she shook, the cuts along her body began to close then they ripped open, again and again, her skin quickly turned a deathly pale color, and her already troubled breathing turned to strained gasps for air. The world around them shook and they heard the ghosts laughing. Jonas glanced over his shoulder to see the rift that Clarissa opened with the deep gate vibrating red eyes glowing from behind the shattered surface.

“What did you do to her!!” Clarissa’s scream sounded through the rumbling earth.

_ “Over and over again, run, rinse, repeat, repeat, repeat. No stop no rest. Over and over again.”  _ the laughter of the ghosts echoed in Jonas’s ear as he clung to Alex. He could hear her mumbling the same things over and over. ‘Is. Leave. Possible. Michael’s alive Michael’s dead, they hate me they don’t hate me…’ It went on and on and Jonas didn’t know what to do. It sounded like she was fighting herself, scrambling to pick one or the other. the sobs and cries of pain sounding from Alex broke his heart over and over. And as quickly as it started it was over. The rumbling stopped, the laughter died out and Alex stopped moving. Jonas glanced over, the portal was gone. Clarissa was sitting with her hand on the controls. Alex still wasn’t moving. Jonas glanced down and saw her lifeless eyes staring at the cave’s ceiling. Dried blood lined the edges of her mouth and stained the ground beneath her. She wasn’t breathing. Jonas gently shook her hoping for a miracle for some grand mercy, but her eyes remained unfocused, her chest remained still. Jonas could no longer see through the tears in his eyes. They were supposed to be able to save her. Jonas hugged Alex’s body close and prayed to whatever existed for a miracle. He heard Clarissa scream behind him, full of anger and hate, and he heard Nona and Ren crying. Then he heard coughing.

Jonas shook his head and looked down at his sister again. She was breathing, Thank anything, everything. She was breathing. “Can-can’t get...rid o-of me that easily.” Jonas laughed through tears as his sister looked up at him, unfocused and obviously exhausted, but alive.

“Thank Vishnu.” Nona gave a wet laugh at Ren’s comment. They both quickly came over and kneeled next to him. Alex looked over at them and gave them a weak smile that couldn’t reach her eyes. Clarissa then kneeled by Jonas and took Alex’s hand.

“Don’t scare us like that you idiot.” Alex grinned again but it was quickly lost as coughs racked her pale and far too thin frame. Jonas held her tightly against his chest, he hardly noticed the pain from his broken rib. They won, they got her back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next up, the wind down
> 
> -Chapter posted: 2/12/2020


	7. The Aftermath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what to put in these chapter summaries; pretzels are salty donuts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody, I'm so glad you all enjoyed the last chapter. This is the final chapter for part 1. I Would just like to take a moment and thank everyone for their support and wonderful comments. ALSO PLEASE READ THE ENDING NOTES. Enjoy the chapter!

Alex was exhausted...It felt like the entire planet had caved into her skull. There were so many memories of the exact same events, with just the tiniest of variations in her head. She couldn’t make sense of any of it. And it was near impossible to recall anything from before the island. She realized she couldn’t remember what her mom looked like. If she had anything left in her body she probably would have burst into tears at that thought. But Alex had nothing inside of her left. She felt like a hollow shell, empty, like she was about to collapse. She was so tired, maybe she could just sleep forever. That sounded really nice.

Alex felt Jonas shift his arms around her as her lungs stopped burning and she could breathe normally again. She felt so weak, she could barely move her arms and the coughing fit left her feeling like she had inhaled molten lead. She let herself go limp, there were so many sensations she had forgotten that existed. There were the smells and sounds, even breathing felt strange, like she was relearning how to ride a bike, unsteady but doable. Then there was the light, she was able to see something other than black or grey. The iridescent colors of the crystal on the cave walls was amazing. But the most noticeable difference was the warmth. It was warm, she could feel the heat from her friends and in the air. The humidity from the lake felt like a nice blanket. She was just so-

“Alex?” Alex opened her eyes to look up at Jonas. She wasn’t quite sure when they closed. Jonas looked like crap, he had been crying. Maybe he still was, everything was a little blurry.

“I..I’m fine, just exhausted.” Alex watched as he nodded before he looked back down and an expression of annoyance came across his features. “I’m not that ugly am I?” Alex really hoped that someone would start saying something, everyone was just watching her and it was starting to get uncomfortable. Jonas looked at her in surprise then confusion, before he started chuckling.

“Still have your sense of humor at least. And yes you are very ugly, and you got blood all over my shirt.” Alex couldn’t manage more than a weak grin for a reaction. It just took too much effort and energy she didn’t have, to do much else. 

“We should probably all get cleaned up before we try to leave.” Alex looked over at Clarissa and felt sick, guilt festered inside her stomach and she quickly turned away. Why was Clarissa being nice to her? The most she could remember was that they hated each other. She wasn’t even sure why she was feeling guilty. Her memories didn’t help the situation. Remembering thousands of times where you sacrificed, saved or hurt the same person all in the same place and time didn’t make sense. What actually happened, what didn’t. A headache started growing in the back of her mind. It was just all too confusing.

“Alex?” Alex blinked and pulled herself out of her thoughts to look over at Clarissa when she called her name. Clarissa was looking at her with worry in her eyes, this was going to take some getting used too.

“Sorry, I spaced out a little.” Alex swallowed as she felt the need to cough, she tried to fight it but lost. Her throat felt like sandpaper. Her coughing fit soon subsided allowing her to breath. Alex took a few deep breaths. “What’s going on?” It was Clarissa who answered.

“Me and Nona are going to help you wash some of the blood out of your clothes.” Alex nodded and tried to sit up. It was agony, the muscles in her stomach screamed in protest and she had to stop trying. “Just relax Alex.” Alex didn’t give a response as she tried to keep her breathing under control. Everything hurt so much and she just wanted it to stop. Nona came over and helped Alex stand. Alex leaned heavily on Nona who didn’t seem affected by almost carrying her. They reached the edge of the lake and Nona sat down next to her. Jonas and Ren left deeper into the cave leaving her with the 2 other girls.

“Give us your jacket Alex. we’ll wash it first.” Alex hesitated. The jacket was the last thing she had of Michael and she didn’t like just handing it over to anyone. But it was covered in blood, her blood. Alex let out a puff of air before carefully maneuvering her arms to pull the jacket off. Embarrassment flooded Alex as she struggled to pull the jacket off. She couldn’t seem to extend her arms all the way or bend them past certain points. Thankfully neither of the two other girls said anything. Nona helped Alex take off her jacket before passing it to Clarissa who started ringing it out in the water. The water was tinted with shades of brown and red and mud, sand, and blood all washed out of the fabric. Alex watched quietly leaning against Nona’s side. “It should recover alright.” Clarissa held up the wet piece of clothing to inspect it for a minute before handing the jacket to Nona. “Alex, give me your shirt.” Alex looked down at her long sleeved shirt. It was completely stained the color of dried blood and there were numerous gashes across the front. It really needed to be cleaned, but Alex hesitated. She knew she wouldn’t be able to get it off on her own, and she was far too tired to deal with any teasing or ridicule. It was strange, with all her memories that didn’t make sense she probably knew everything there was to know about her friends. But she realized because of those same memories however, she didn’t know them. She didn’t know if she was with cruel Clarissa, or the Clarissa that had been dating her brother. Was she dealing with shy and sweet Nona, or the Nona that could pick you apart with a few words.

“We really need to clean it Alex.” Alex glanced over to Nona who was watching her with a kind smile but sad smile on her face. It was all so confusing, she wanted to believe everything was okay, that the hug Jonas had given her wasn’t an act, but she just didn’t know. Alex glanced between Clarissa and Nona, they both were just silently watching her. Alex let her shoulders slump back down and began to try and remove her shirt. After an embarrassing few moments of trying to take it off on her own, she stopped and glanced at Nona. Nona didn’t say anything, she just moved behind Alex and helped her remove her shirt. The oppressing weight that dominated Alex’s sense of feeling didn’t lessen when the shirt came off. Alex heard Nona try to stifle a gasp behind her. Alex looked at herself for a moment before hugging her knees to her chest and squeezing her eyes shut. All across her arms were jagged scars. One of her wrists was almost an entirely different color. Across her stomach was a massive scar that made it look like an entire bus had been plunged through her gut. Numerous other scars lined her whole body. She felt weak, like she was about to shatter and she hated it. Between the constant pain that wouldn’t leave her alone, the mutilated memories, and incapability to move on her own Alex felt useless. As she listened to Clarissa wash her shirt, she realized that she could at least recall the general idea of events.

1; they all came to the island

2; she opened the gate and released the sunken, all of it was her fault

3; she travelled the island, messed with her radio, caused more problems and found everyone

4; they went down into the cave and she messed with the ghosts again.

From there the memories wildly diverged lacking any cohesion. But after that was pretty much the same. They went home and never talked about the island again. Maybe. Alex squeezed her legs as she struggled to recall the events of the night? Day? year? But the memories began to slip away again and she felt her body begin to rebel against her. A cough worked its way up her sandpaper throat and pain erupted as her whole body shook with the force of the coughs. When the coughs tapered out she realized Nona was holding her. Alex didn’t try to fight her way out, it felt warm.

“I hope you weren’t too attached to this thing, it is pretty much just a fancy rag at this point.” Alex opened her eyes to see Clarissa offering her mangled shirt. Alex wished she could understand why Clarissa was being so nice to her. However, Alex didn’t say anything, just took the shirt and began to try and tuck her body into it.

“Hey everyone decent?” That sounded like Ren.

“Ren! Get out of here, Alex doesn't have her shirt on yet.” Alex felt Nona move away to deal with her new boyfriend and Clarissa kneeled down to help her with her shirt.

“What you know Alex and I have seen each other with far less.” Alex coughed out what was supposed to be a laugh but just sounded like lung cancer. 

“It doesn’t count if you were both babies, you’re both grown up now you idiot.” Nona sounded genuinely offended for her. Alex finished slipping her arms into the ruined sleeves and glanced at Clarissa who was rolling her eyes at the conversation. Clarissa noticed Alex’s stare and gave her a small smile.

Alex decided not to question it.

“All right, All right, I just wanted to let you guys know that somehow the quaking knocked the cave entrance open, it should be easier to get out that way instead of using the ladder. Hopefully” Alex glanced over at Ren who was fidgeting with his fingers. She could tell he was trying not to just stare at her. “But yeah, Jonas is getting a fire started so we don’t have to sit around in wet clothes. It should be easier than climbing back up the bunker ladder.” Clarissa stared at Ren as he stood in the entrance to the cave room fiddling with his hands. “So..um, yeah. I’ll just go now.” Ren didn’t move and Clarissa raised an eyebrow at him giving him a very impressive glare. Ren spun on his heel and carefully stumbled out of the room. Alex laughed quietly, her stomach and throat hurting too much to be any louder. Clarissa upon hearing her laugh turned towards her and Alex found herself on the receiving end of a genuine smile from Clarissa of all people. Her shock must have shown on her face because Clarissa rolled her eyes.

“Let's finish getting the blood off of you.” Clarissa and Nona helped Alex get the blood out of her hair and pants. The process was relatively quick and the water from the underground lake was warm so it wasn’t uncomfortable. After Nona and Clarissa finished cleaning any remnants of blood from their hands and clothes they helped Alex stand between them and guided her out of the cavern. After a few less than safe jumps and short climbs that had Clarissa using some very colorful language, they made it to the mouth of the cave. Alex felt a little guilty, Clarissa and Nona almost had to carry her at multiple points, they didn’t seem too bothered by it though. The short trip had, however, left Alex more exhausted than she already was. She was ready to just lay down on the ground and fall asleep.

Ren had been correct to a degree. The cave mouth was once again open to the outside. The only obstacle was a very unstable pile of boulders and stones that towered over them. Another set of explicatives from Clarissa had Alex in a coughing fit that was supposed to be a laugh. She was so tired. They made it over the rock pile with only a few issues. Nona almost broke her foot when a smaller rock fell between a couple of larger one dropping her foot into a hole. Alex was very surprised by the swear Nona let out. As they left the cave a light seared itself into Alex’s eyes. Alex squeezed her eyes shut and grimaced from the pain.

“You okay Alex?” Alex was getting really tired of that question. 

“Yes Nona, I’m fine. It's just really bright.” Nona didn’t say anything for a moment. And Alex found herself desperately wanting to know her thoughts in that moment.

“That’s okay, you can keep them closed just duck your head down when we pass through the fence.” Alex could feel herself faltering. She was about ready to just fall over. But she struggled through the next few steps. She felt the fence catch on the back of her jacket as she slipped through and felt as the stone changed to sand underneath her boots. There were a lot more sounds out here then there were in the cave, the waves crashing against the beach, the crackling of the fire, and the distant sounds of birds chirping in the trees. It was peaceful and Alex found herself begging to fall asleep before she even made it to the fire. She heard Nona chuckle as they made it to the fire. The heat radiating from the fire felt amazing. It was almost enough to help her forget about the icy cold inside of her and the pain in her body. Almost. 

She ended up leaning against someone's side as they told Jonas and Ren to go clean up in the cave. Alex barely registered the words. Moments from falling asleep Alex cracked her eyes open to take a look around and saw she was leaning against Clarissa, who actually had an arm around her shoulders. Alex really didn’t understand what was going on. But she didn’t have time to question it as her body and mind finally gave out on her, the pain having taxed the last of her capability to move, leaving her to a dreamless sleep.

…………..

To say Nona was concerned for Alex would be a vast misinterpretation of her emotions. She was terrified. Ever since Alex had almost died in Jonas’ arms, which was not a fun experience, she was distant. She was spacing out constantly, she seemed confused and lost a majority of the time, and she could barely move on her own. And then there were the scars. Nona didn’t know what Alex went through with the ghosts but she never wanted to hear the explanation. The scars across Alex’s body were horrific. The worst and most noticeable scars were the ones on her wrist, stomach and face. The others scattered about her body were not too noticeable but still concerning. Nona was glad that Alex was resting, it would hopefully help her feel better and it gave Nona time to talk to Clarissa and destress.

“So do we want to talk about it.” Nona knew Clarissa would know exactly what she was talking about.

“The obviously brutal experience that Alex went through or the fact that she looks at us like we are about to take her head off?” A snarl occupied Clarissa’s face as she spoke Nona frowned at Clarissa’s blunt but accurate expression. Ever since the first ghost's experience Nona had become far more outgoing and sure of herself, but being back here on the island pulled old habits and traits back out. It was doing the same with Clarissa. She was never going to come back here again if she could help it.

“I meant the fearful looks but we can talk about the scars too.” Nona felt anger swelling in her gut as Clarissa gave her a strange look. Nona wasn’t angry at Clarissa, she really wasn’t. But she was infuriated by the whole situation around them. Alex’s scars, the fearful looks, the obvious agony her friend was in. Nona wanted nothing more than to throttle the ghosts, to make them feel some measure of the pain that Alex was in. She wanted revenge. And she really wanted to know what Clarissa knew that she had yet to share. Clarissa stared at the fire and Nona waited patiently for some explanation. The thought crossed Nona’s mind that it might not be fair to expect answers from Clarissa, but she didn’t really care. She just needed something. Something to focus on to keep her mind off of everything else. She almost missed Clarissa’s words, lost in her thoughts.

“When I went through the portal, I-,” Nona realized that Clarissa was crying, and the anger leached from her body, replaced by guilt for demanding answers from her. “I saw what the ghosts had been doing to her.” Nona had never heard Clarissa’s voice this quiet. Genuine concern another one of her friends sprouted up in her feelings. “It was dark, and really cold. It felt like my fingers were made of ice. It was nearly impossible to breath...it felt like I was dead.” Nona really didn’t like where this explanation was going. “I’m not sure how long I was in there, but when I got close to finding Alex, well it felt like when I was possessed. I was hoping I would be able to forget that feeling.” Clarissa took a shaky breath and Nona scooted over to take her hand. “I started seeing memories, some of them mine from, that night. But the majority of them were Alex’s. I didn’t realize it at first but it started feeling like I was the one in the memories, I was the one experiencing everything. Nona she lived the same thing over and over.” Nona could see Clarissa’s arm tighten around Alex protectively. “Nona they used our faces to torture and hurt her.” Nona felt everything inside of her freeze. “They us, to tear her apart, they even used Michael, MICHEAL, to shatter her wrist. In her memories Nona, we are the ones who tortured her, we are the ones who put her through hell. They never let her sleep. Never let her injuries heal, at least not fully. When I found her Nona, she was in a pool of her own blood”

Nona was at a loss for words. All the explanations she was expecting, that was not one of them. “So we literally tortured her and she didn’t flip us off in the cave, and trusted us enough to help her with her clothes?” Clarissa laughed at that.

“Trust me I thought the same. I guess that maybe the thousands of other memories and all the pain she was in kept her distracted from whether she trusted us or not.” Nona smiled at the tone in Clarissa’s voice, she was going to be okay. Clarissa gave her a lopsided smile before turning back to the fire. Her expression turned somber. “I just keep thinking about that original night. If that, maybe if I had been stronger Alex never would have had to go through any of this. She gave me a second chance, Nona.” Nona didn’t respond to Clarissa’s words. She knew her friend just needed to vent a little.

“This island has really screwed us up hasn’t it.” Clarissa laughed.

“Yeah it has. It really has.” Clarissa looked away from the fire and up at the stars. Nona chose to watch the embers. The waves of heat and fire almost looked like a dance. Nona smiled and leaned against Clarissa’s free shoulder, just enjoying the peace. “What am I now? A Pillow.”

“Yep!” Nona smiled as she heard Clarissa snort in response. After the nerves of over a year of preparation, the months of build up leading to this night, sitting by the fire with her friends was the best thing that could have happened. It was strange, since the portal closed for the second time all the weird temperatures and feelings that had been plaguing them all night were gone. The cool summer air was chased back by the fire and the few breezes that wandered their way across the beach felt nice against her face. It was wonderfully peaceful.

“How’s it cracka-lackin?” And of course the peaceful silence had to be broken by her idiotic boyfriend whom she loved and wanted to stab. Nona sat up and looked behind her at towards the cave entrance to see a soaking wet Ren walking towards them, a trail of water behind him. Jonas walked a few steps behind Ren off to the side watching him carefully.

“What did you do?” Nona could hear Clarissa holding back laughter at her outburst. Ren looked offended for a moment before sputtering his response.

“Why do you automatically assume I did something? Jonas is the one who has actually gone to jail for doing things, it's his fault anyways.” Jonas rolled his eyes at Ren.

“I’m sorry, who is the one that said, and I quote; ‘Come on Jonas, lighten up a little, it's just water’ after shoving me into the lake?” Ren didn’t respond. Nona let out a heavy sigh.

“That doesn’t explain why Ren brought the whole lake outside with him.”

“Oh that's because Jonas threw me in afterwards.” Nona gave Jonas a glare to which he merely shrugged and moved to sit down by the fire on Alex’s free side. Nona turned to Ren and was staring at her. A huge grin spread across his face and Nona promised herself she wouldn’t kill anyone.

“You know you love me Nona. Hug it out?” Ren spread his arms wide and began to walk towards Nona with a massive grin on his face.

“Ren, don't you dare, I will personally throw you into the ocean.”

“But Nona I’m your boyfriend, surely we can work this out.” Ren was still advancing towards her with his arms outstretched and Nona took a step back to avoid his hug. Clarissa was shaking with the effort to hold her laughter. Nona would get payback for this.

“Yes you are. But no hugs, cuddles or kisses until you are all dried off.” Ren let his arms fall to his sides and gaped at her in mock horror, before he turned to Jonas.

“I’ve been bamboozled, the love of my life doesn’t want me anymore.” Clarissa lost her silent war at that point and Jonas was chuckling as well. Nona was already plotting her revenge.

“Sit down Ren, or I’m going to make you go find more wood.” Ren finally took the hint and sat down across from Jonas. Nona sat next to him. The fire was fairly small so it didn’t take much wood to keep it running. For the next few hours they laughed and joked and for a while they were able to pretend that they were just a group of friends that came out to enjoy the beach. As midnight passed and the fire died down to embers their carefree conversations turned to more serious topics.

Nona wiped the tears of laughter from her eyes as everyone calmed down. It was nice just being able to have fun. The weeks leading up to tonight had been full of nerves and doubt, but now, they were all just gone. 

“So, uh what are we going to tell everyone.” They all looked at Ren as the good mood dampened a little, but their spirits were still high. Nona wasn’t sure what they would tell everyone. It wasn’t like they could just show up and be like; ‘hi, this is our friend who everyone thought went missing and died 2 years ago. She actually got kidnapped by a bunch of ghosts that live on the island and we used science to fight the ghosts and essentially bring her back from the dead!’ That really wouldn’t go over well.

“We found her in the woods?” Nona said it more as a joke. Did they really have to say anything? Wouldn’t everyone be too busy being happy she was back to look at how it happened?

“That’s actually probably our best bet. I told my parents that I was coming out here to test my project on the weird signals you can get on radios. So if we tell everyone that when we got here the cave was open they would most likely believe us. We just have to act like it was luck that we stumbled across Alex in the woods.” Nona wasn’t surprised Clarissa had put some forethought into this section of the plan. Jonas, Ren and herself were so focused on the saving Alex part they didn’t think about the aftermath. “I don’t think anyone will look into it too closely. The police might talk to us about it but I don’t think they will be too invested.”

“I want to take her to my-our, parents before anything else. They should know before everyone else finds out.” Jonas was the most reserved out of all of them tonight. Nona supposed it would make sense. His life would be changed the most by the events of tonight. He was probably also not looking forward to the conversation with his parents. The police couldn’t interrogate you like an angry parent could. 

“Everything’s going to be okay Jonas.” Jonas merely nodded in response to Clarissa and a comfortable silence overtook the group. The sound of the fire and wind was calming. The four friends took advantage of the quiet. When the sun rose it was going to be a long day. Nona felt her eyelids growing heavy as the events of the night began to catch up with her. She didn’t let herself fall asleep though, with sunrise only an hour away they would have to get up and get moving fairly soon. A noise drew Nona’s attention and she looked over to Alex stirring, and then she woke up.

……………..

_ It was cold. Everything around her was a pitch black, just endless black. Red eyes formed in the distance and unintelligible whispers brushed against her like wind around her ankles. Pain crawled across her person like rats, scratching and biting at her skin. The voices don’t make any sense and the pain is sporadic, everywhere and nowhere all at once. The last thing she sees before she wakes up is two red eyes and the feeling of water in her lungs. _

Alex’s eyes slowly creak open, the fire burns holes into her eyes but she forces her eyes to stay open. The feeling of the cold and darkness of her dream cling to her even as the details fade from memory. The warmth and light of the fire is far better, even with the pain it brings. Alex vaguely registers someone calling her name, she doesn't have the energy to seek them out or respond. Alex’s eyes quickly adjust to the rather dim light the fire is giving off and she enjoys the way the light seems to dance. Conversation starts back up around her and Alex finds herself at relative peace. The pain still dances across her body when she shifts even the smallest degree and her thoughts are muddled and vague, but she feels safe, protected. The time passes quickly, and soon the sky begins to light up against the horizon. The resulting light however burns Alex’s eyes. The pain forces her eyes closed as they water.

“Hey Alex, you doing alright.” That was Jonas, she thinks her head still isn’t working quite right.

“Yeah...im okay. The light just hurts, like really hurts.” There were a few moments of silence and then whispered conversation before Jonas responded to her.

“Here try this.” Alex felt Jonas try something around her face covering her eyes from the harsh light glaring in from the horizon. “Should keep your delicate girl vision from the sun.” Alex frowned at that and if she had the energy she probably would have smacked Jonas. Thankfully Clarissa had the same thought. A dull thump sounded closely followed by an explicative from Jonas. “What the crap Clarissa, that hurt.”

“Delicate does not equal weak Jonas, just had to remind you.” Alex quietly chuckled as Nona and Ren teased Jonas. He didn’t sound too offended by their jabbing remarks. Alex sat and enjoyed the conversation flowing around the campfire. She deliberately chose not to think about the fact that someone that hated her was letting her use her as a headrest. Nope, does not think about that at all. The sun rose quickly and even through the makeshift blindfold Alex could feel her eyes burning. Things began to get hazy as they helped her stand up and begin walking. She recalls moments of climbing the cliffs, Clarissa cussing Ren out and someone almost falling off of one of the walls. At some point she was pulled from her thoughts and she realized that they were aboard the ferry. She figured that she should be concerned that she doesn’t remember working her way from the beach to the cliffs but she finds she doesn’t care. Whoever she’s currently leaning against has their arm around her shoulders, and she feels a momentary flash of frustration at her incapability to really do anything on her own. She tries to focus on the sounds of the ferry and the waves crashing against the hull. Seagulls were making noise somewhere above her and Alex let her thoughts drift through the thousands of memories she had of leaving the island on the ferry, picking apart their differences and similarities. A few moments pass and her heart plummets.

How many times as she left the island? A sick feeling washes over her as she looks through her memories, she remembers countless times leaving the island, going home, starting school, not starting school. Something inside of her breaks. She hopes whoever she is leaning against doesn’t notice her heartbreak. The memories are clearer now, she has done this a million times over. She leans into the shoulder next to her, pleading for the realization to go away. She just tries to focus on the sounds surrounding her, trying to escape her own thoughts.

…………………..

  
  


Jonas was going to explode. First of all he was really concerned for Alex, she kept spacing in and out. And there were large sections of time where she just wasn’t there. She would move and react if they told her too, but she was lifeless. And then on the boat her shoulders started shaking and she pressed into his side. Something was bothering her, the only problem was that it could literally be anything. And he had no way to help her with any of it. Secondly he was going to have to explain to his parents that Alex was back. The weeks and months following Alex’s disappearance had been some of the worst times of his life. His dad and Alex’s mom were constantly arguing and yelling at each other. Jonas went to sleep every night wondering if he was going to lose a second mother. Somehow, by some miracle they had pulled through together. They were now still happily married and life was going well. Jonas was about to throw all of it into a blender. And finally Jonas was exhausted, after nearly 24 hours of no sleep and the events of the night, biology was beginning to catch up with him. The ferry docked with the shore and the five of them trudged over to Jonas’s jeep. They got strange looks from other ferry goers but everyone thankfully left them alone.

Jonas slumped into the drivers seat while Ren hopped into the passenger seat. The three girls all piled into the back with Alex in the center. The drive through the trees back to Camena took a few minutes, that to Jonas seemed like hours. His every thought was filled with dread at the coming conversation. Jonas was hoping that his parents took it well. Jonas pulled to a stop in front of his house. It was a simple two story house with a window up where the attic would be. The yellow walls and white trim reflected the morning light making the house appear as if it was shining. A tree planted in the front yard twisted around itself as it went upwards. The 2 cars in the driveway told him that both of his parents were home. Which on one hand was nice because he would only have to explain everything once. On the other hand he had to face both of his parents at once.

“Do you need some help?” Jonas glanced over to Ren and back to Clarissa and Nona in the backseat who were both holding Alex’s white knuckled hands, Jonas briefly wondered what scared her before answering Ren’s question.

“No, I'll be fine. Just wait a few minutes before you guys come inside. I don’t want to give them a heart attack.” 

“Will do champ. Try not to get murdered.”

Jonas groaned “That is not helpful Ren.” he slipped out of the car and slowly made his way up to the door. Off to his right on the patio was a bench swing and windchimes that tinkled with the soft breeze. Steeling his nerves Jonas opened the door.

The wooden floor creaked as he stepped inside. The smell of eggs and what he was guessing was sausage wafted in from the kitchen the sizzling sound lent itself to this explanation. It also seemed that his father had heard his entry into the house.

“Come on in Champ, your mom will be down in a minute. She has a meeting this morning before work.” Jonas didn’t respond. The weight in his throat made it hard to breath and he could feel his eyes well up with tears. He took a shaky breath before making his way towards the kitchen passing the living room on his way. “Bud?” Jonas stopped as his dad peeked his head into the hallway. He tried to say something but couldn’t. His dad must have noticed something because he abandoned the breakfast to the hungry stove and walked up to him with concern written across his features. “Jonas is everything alright?” Jonas laughed at that, his voice cracking part way through.

“Yes and no, could we sit down somewhere?” Jonas swore his knees were going to give out from under him. He shouldn’t be this terrified of this conversation. He had good news Alex was back, she was alive. But he was so terrified about what was going to happen next. Jonas’ dad nodded and looked around flustered for a moment.

“Hey boys, what's going on?” Jonas and his dad turned to face his stepmom as she entered the room. Jonas felt another wave of guilt come over him. He loved her, for all intents and purposes she was his mom. He never knew her before Alex disappeared, he hoped that this wouldn’t change their relationship. Looking at her expression Jonas was able to pinpoint exactly when she noticed that something was wrong. “Is everything okay?” Jonas closed his eyes and nodded.

“Can we go sit down in the living room.” Thankfully his voice wasn’t too scratchy this time around. Jonas led the way into the living room taking a seat so he had his back to the wall and was facing his parents on his right, the window to his left, and the front door in front of him. His parents sat down together their worry for him evident on their faces as they held hands. The sight almost made him laugh, they were in for a very big shock. “So, I don’t really know how to explain this, I don’t even know if you would believe me.” Jonas took a breath to try and calm his nerves and quell the nausea. “Just promise me that you won’t freak out, okay?” Jonas almost felt bad about asking that from them. He knew they were going to freak out. His parents nodded and Jonas pulled out his phone and shot Ren a quick text. He put his phone away and waited. He could tell his parents were dying to ask him something and he was grateful that they didn’t. Jonas studied his parents for a moment. His fathers beard looked freshly trimmed, his green eyes shining with worry. They were a darker shade then Jonas’. His brown hair sat messily on his head. He was dressed in his too small apron, jeans and a green t-shirt with a hunting joke on it. His mom had brown hair pulled back into a braid that reached her shoulders, a striped shirt sat underneath a blue windbreaker. Her jeans looked new. Her brown eyes held worry as well but her face was relaxed. She was always the more patient one.

  
  


A knock sounded at the door before it slowly creaked open. Ren peeked his head in and bit his lip when he saw everyone in the living room. Ren ducked back out for just a moment and then he walked in and held the door open. Right behind him came Nona supporting a weary looking Alex. Jonas heard the gasp from his mom and his dad choke on air as they saw her. Even with everything they did to try and clean her up Alex still looked terrible. Her teal hair was covered with dirt, her jacket was similarly covered. Her shirt and pants still had a few blood stains that had refused to come out. Beyond that, she was pale far from the slight brown that her mom had and that she had when Jonas first met her. her skin was tight over her bones and the scars on her face were easily visible. She looked- well, she looked like she had been lost in the woods for 2 years.

“Alex?” Jonas looked over to his parents, his father was staring eyes blown open wide and mouth hanging open. His mom had a hand over her mouth, tears forming in her eyes. She moved forward and with shaking hands removed the blindfold over her daughter’s eyes. Alex’s face contorted in pain at the sudden light but she blinked her eyes open to look at her mother’s face.

“Hey, mom.” Jonas watched his parents break.

…………….

April Miller was a woman of few things. She found the most joy in the important people in her life. Until recently it had seemed like life was determined to take everyone away from her. Her first marriage had been difficult. But she had two wonderful children to take off and they were everything to her. So when Michael had died and her marriage had been shattered, all she had left had been her daughter. Michaels death had hurt Alex deeply. She became even more rebellious than April had thought possible and had lashed out at the world and society. April had done her best to be there for her daughter and they had survived together. Almost a year later April had met Matthew. He was kind and funny. They met, started talking and everything took off from there. She learned that he had a son about Alex’s age and she had hoped that it would be good for both kids to have a sibling. Then the night the two kids had met life struck again. Jonas came home alone distraught, when he first told them that Alex was gone she thought it was an elaborate joke. But once the police had gotten involved April had realized that it was very much real and that her daughter was never coming home. The revelation had almost killed her, it had come so very close to killing her. But April was not someone who could be called weak. She focused on Matthew and Jonas who had been wracked with guilt. And she healed her own shattered heart by helping Jonas heal his. When Jonas had come home fidgeting and tear filled eyes she was expecting that maybe he was having trouble with school or maybe with the memories of Alex. April still had her own rough days. She had not been expecting her dead daughter to walk through the front door looking like a bear had used her as a chewing toy. April Clung to Alex. She sobbed as she felt her daughter alive and breathing in her arms. But then the coughing started and terror gripped April’s heart as she really looked at her daughter. Her pale skin held almost no color where it was supposed to be a brown like her own. Dark circles curled underneath her eyes and three scars lined her cheek. Alex’s entire body shook with the force of her coughs and April realized just how thin her daughter was.

“H-how, I- I don- what.” Matthew was sputtering behind her. He had never gotten to know Alex for himself. He only knew her from the stories April had told him. The coughs finally subsided and Alex slumped into her arms. April held her tightly falling to her knees to cradle Alex against her chest.

“We found her wandering the island.” Jonas’ tone was flat and April knew he wasn’t saying something but she focused on holding her daughter. Matthew was probably going into shock, she could smell something burning and Ren walked deeper into the house. Jonas and Ren had become close friends after that night. April had been surprised when Jonas’ had asked to be able to invite some friends over and Clarissa and Nona had shown up alongside Ren. She hadn’t seen Clarissa since Micheal died, but it seemed that somehow Jonas had befriended her. Eventually Clarissa had approached her and apologized for her borderline cruelty towards Alex after Michaels death. That had been a strange day for April.

As April kneeled on the floor holding Alex her brain began to catch up to her panic. She saw that all four of the kids looked exhausted and she almost wanted to invite them to fall asleep on her couch. But her thoughts were stopped when she realized when she probably needed to take her daughter to the hospital. “Matthew could you please grab the keys for the car and shut down the house. We need to go to the hospital.” it showed how shocked he was when he obeyed without responding. She watched as Nona checked her phone before turning to Jonas.

“I need to get home, my parents are wondering where I’m at. I told them I would be back early in the morning.”

“Yeah, i’m in the same boat. I don’t think I can keep myself awake any longer.” Ren did look like he was about to fall over. April watched as Jonas saw Nona and Ren out the door, and was surprised by Clarissa’s response.

“I want to come with you.” Jonas didn’t fight her and April supposed it would be good for Jonas to have a friend with him. Matthew finished taking care of the house and April carried Alex out to their car. The ease with which she was able to pick Alex up was very concerning. At this point however April simply added it to the ‘reasons to get to the hospital’ list. April climbed into the back of the car with Alex and Clarissa. Jonas sat in the passenger seat and Matthew started the car. The drive to the hospital seemed to flash by. Alex had a few more coughing fits in the car that had April biting her knuckles with worry.

Getting into the hospital was easy especially when the nurse was shown Alex’s condition. They were hurried to a room and a number of nurses began to tend to her daughter while they were all shown out of the room. The four passed the time in silence. Clarissa was sitting next to Jonas comforting him as he held his head in his hands. April was going to have to thank Clarissa when all of this was over.

  
  


The doctor returned after an hour and led them all to Alex’s room. Alex’s jacket hung at the end of her bed as the only salvageable piece of clothing that she had been wearing. “Is she going to be okay.” The words sounded strained even to her own words. April just didn’t know how to feel. She was looking at her dead daughter, alive in a hospital bed.

The nurse hesitated. “Do we mind if we talk in the hall?” April stared at the man in front of her as the words settled like lead in her stomach. She nodded and she stepped out into the hall with Matthew. “I’m going to be honest with you, I have no idea how she is even still alive.” April’s heart stopped. “I’m not sure about the full extent of her injuries, the doctor is looking over all the results now, but something or someone did a number on your daughter. She has an abundance of scars, her wrist shows signs of having been broken and there are a number of severe scars across her body.” the nurse shook his head. “We believe she will recover but it will take much more than just an extended hospital stay.” April let her thoughts drift, the ambience of the hospital filling her mind as Matthew and the nurse talked. She was worried for her daughter, she wasn’t quite sure this wasn’t a dream.

“Mr. and Mrs. Young?” April turned towards the new voice to find a middle aged woman with glasses standing a few feet away. She nodded and the doctor stepped towards them. “It's nice to meet you, I’m Doctor Wendy. I’ll be the one in charge of your daughter’s care during her stay here. First thing I wanted to ask is if you might know why she doesn’t show up in any records we have access too.

“She went missing two years ago.” both the nurse and doctor seemed surprised by that statement.

“Okay, may I ask how she was found.”

“Our son Jonas said that he and his friends found her in the woods on Edwards island. He didn’t give me any details.” the doctor nodded and seemed to think for a moment.

“Well, first we should contact the police. If she is filed as a missing person it would make it easier to access her medical records. I would like to have Jonas with us when we go over your daughter’s condition, maybe he can help us understand some of what happened.” April nodded and Matthew ducked into the room to retrieve Jonas. “Mrs. Young?”

“Please call me April, Mrs. Young makes me feel old.” The doctor smiled.

“Well, April, I promise you that your daughter will be receiving our best care and we will do everything we can to make sure she fully recovers.” April nodded and at this point remembered about her meeting. She shot a quick text to one of her coworkers telling them that she was dealing with a family emergency as the doctor showed them to a conference room. The pictures of the scars and injuries made April feel sick. Multiple broken bones that hadn’t healed correctly, the scar across her abdomen that indicated that someone had cut her daughter open, and the numerous other scars were a horrific sight. That wasn’t even including the internal damage; Alex’s lungs had more scar tissue then healthy flesh, the severe dehydration and malnutrition had affected all of her internal organs, and some organs had scar tissues that appeared to be caused by the same thing that gave her the car across her abdomen. And when Jonas explained how she had acted when they found her didn’t help April’s worry. She could only hope that her daughter could heal.

  
  


…………………….

Clarissa was so tired. She had been awake for close to 30 or so hours. But she couldn’t fall asleep. Whenever she closed her eyes her mind flashed with the terrible images and feelings she had experienced when she entered the portal to rescue Alex. So, she was here in the hospital. Clarissa looked down to her lap where she was holding Alex’s jacket, she reached into the pocket and pulled out 2 small handheld radios. One was a steel gray and the other a red not unlike the jacket. She recognized the red radio as the one that Alex had when they first arrived at the island. She was guessing the other was the one she had picked up to open all the locks around the island. Clarissa didn’t personally remember those events but Jonas and Nona had told her about them. It was so strange how something so small and unimposing could literally open portals to other dimensions, it's also what had caused immeasurable pain to Alex, herself and their friends. She wanted to throw it out the window but she couldn’t. She just couldn’t. Clarissa was pulled from her thoughts when Alex began to stir, she quickly stood and walked over to Alex. Alex was looking around frantically, her eyes were unfocused and her hands were grasping at the bed sheets.

“Hey Alex, everythings fine. You’re in the hospital right now. You kinda passed out during the drive.” Alex’s eyes latched onto hers and Clarissa waited for a response; she was a little worried when tears welled up in Alex’s eyes. “Alex? Are you alright?”

“Why are you being so nice to me? I thought you hated me.” Alex’s voice was barely above a whisper. Clarissa felt guilt at the back of her mind. It seems this conversation was coming sooner rather than later.

“Alex, you saved my life. For almost a year I blamed you for Micheal’s death.” Clarissa breathed heavily. “I was terrible to you. And even after all of that you sacrificed yourself to save me.” the confusion and fear in Alex’s eyes turned into understanding “It doesn’t change what I did, but for what it’s worth I am so sorry. I am sorry I was so terrible to you.” Clarissa realized she was crying, no rest for the weary she guessed. “I am sorry Alex.” Clarissa let silence envelope them. Alex was silent for a moment. Clarissa took a deep breath and brought her emotions back under control. She really needed to get some sleep.

“I’m sorry too.” Clarissa shook her head at that, Alex didn’t need to apologize. But it felt nice. “You were totally a jerk, I mean you could have powered a third world country with all that anger. All those poor kids.” Clarissa laughed. Of course she would be cracking jokes at this point.

After the laughter subsided, Clarissa softly asked Alex, “how are you doing? Really?” Alex stared her in the eyes for a few moments before slumping into the bed.

“It really hurts Clarissa.” Clarissa took Alex’s hand as her voice cracked. “It really, really hurts.” It wasn’t going to be easy but hopefully, they could all finally heal. They could finally move forward and leave the ghosts, and the island, behind them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part 2 is a series of one shots that will be taking place between the end of this chapter and the start of the school year within the story. I am taking suggestions on what to write here. I plan to use the time spent on these one shots to more fully go over my outlines for parts 3 and 4. So it'll be a few weeks before we continue the main story. SO PLEASE, let me know if there are scenes you would like to see in the comments. Even if they wouldn’t fall within the time period specified, I might be able to find some way to include them. Thank you for your support!


	8. Back into the world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more story...YaY!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know i honestly just post these pretty much as soon as I finish writing the chapter. the only editing i do is to quickly check for grammar by looking for the squiggly red lines under words. so I apologize if my writing is sometimes painful to read. but yeah if you guys have been wondering why my update schedule is like shot in the foot that's why. also college is a pain. Anyways this is the beginning of the group of one shots as i prepare for the next part of the main story. looking at all the suggestions have given me some fun ideas so thank you to those who commented. hope you enjoy!

“Alright Alex just one more time and then we can get you ready for your parents.” Alex tried really hard to resist snapping at the nurse. They were only there to help her. So with only a heavily exaggerated sigh, Alex stood up, grabbed the handrail and began to walk. Alex was currently doing a final physical therapy check before she was released from the hospital. All she had to do was walk back and forth a few times on the short walkway before sitting down again. She hated it. The physical therapy room wasn’t too big, but it easily held enough room for multiple patients at a time. Usually there were a few other people in the room with her when she did her little walks. It felt so uncomfortable. Alex felt like she was on display. She was 17 for goodness sake, she shouldn’t be relying on a handrail to walk 15 feet. Yet here she was, her legs shaking and sweat on her forehead as she struggled through the short distance she had to walk. “You’re doing great, just a little more.” Alex was really trying hard not to snap. She reached the end of the walkway and turned around. Her bare feet pressing against the rubbery surface of the walkway. 17 and a cripple, great. Was she even seventeen anymore? Alex hadn’t been able to get a lot out of anyone exactly how long she had been missing? Dead? Possesed? No one would tell her anything other than; ‘Good job’, ‘you’re doing great’, just breath’. It was so infuriating. Honestly it wasn’t even the exercises that annoyed Alex. She understood she had to do them in order to be able to walk normally again, she just hated the stares she would get sometimes. The few other people she had seen in here were far older than her, and even some of the nurses or doctors would give her pitying looks and she just hated it. She didn’t want everyone feeling sorry for her, and whatever story people had cooked up. She just wanted to be normal again. She almost wished she could go back to the moment she had stepped foot on the island just so she could tell herself to leave and never come back. But she remembered all those transmissions she sent back through the island’s radios, all the times she tried escaping only to end up living it over and over again. 

Alex reached her wheelchair again and gratefully lowered herself into the seat. She was finally going home today. Home. she couldn’t really remember what it looked like exactly. Her memories from before the island had slowly begun to come back to her. But it was moments here and there, never a full picture. A lot of them involved Michael. Alex’s heart hurt as she remembered all the times stuck in the loop where she had brought Michael back. It hurt a lot to think that she had that chance and that ability only to find out it was a lie. The nurse finished writing on her clipboard and came behind Alex and took the handles on her wheelchair to push her towards her room. “You did amazing, you should feel proud very few people get back on their feet this fast.” Alex managed a polite nod while strangling the arm of her wheelchair. “Don’t worry you can curse me all you want when you get home.” Alex tensed up for a moment before slumping into her chair.

“Was I that obvious.” The nurse merely smiled and nodded at her. That was another thing that was annoying her. Everyone, literally everyone, was able to pick out exactly what she was feeling at any given moment. She was literally unable to hide anything. It was so frustrating, she felt like she was in a public bathroom without any stalls. Completely exposed. “It's not you,” Alex really didn’t want the nurses thinking she hated them, she didn’t. She just hated everything else about the situation. “I just...It’s-”

“It's alright, we don’t take it personally.” The nurse quickly moved her through the halls weaving around others moving in the opposite direction. “You’re a young girl stuck in a hospital relearning how to walk. It's a tough situation.” Alex just let out a sigh and remained quiet for the rest of the short jaunt to her hospital room. In a few hours her step-father would be showing up with some clothes for her to change into and then she would be heading home. The nurse swung the door open to her room and helped her into the bed. After making sure she didn’t need anything else, the nurse left Alex alone with her thoughts. The morning sunlight streaming in from the window bathed everything in a bright yellow glow. It was peaceful. Alex’s thoughts drifted around before eventually settling on her family. Her mom had been extremely careful around Alex like she was made of glass, Jonas was always happy to see her though he avoided talking about anything before he saved her from the ghosts, and her stepdad was really really nice. Alex supposed that she didn’t really have a shining example of a father to compare him too. He was just a big goofball. He cracked jokes, told stories, and seemed determined to make her laugh every time he visited. It was nice.

Alex slid her gaze back to the view from her window. The tops of trees were visible between her and the other buildings. The sun was shining from between the two buildings in her view catching the leaves and birds flying about. 2 months. That was how long she had been in here. 2 months of therapy, IVs, disgusting hospital food and being poked and prodded by a variety of nurses and a couple doctors. In less than 2 hours she would be out of here. Alex couldn’t wait.  
……….

The two hours passed rather quickly and Alex couldn’t help the grin that came across her face when her step-dad, Matthew, came into the room followed by the doctor. Doctor Wendy was a really nice woman. Alex had spent a decent amount of time with her during her stay as she ran her through different tests. “Well Alex, your big day is finally here. Your father here brought you some clothes so while one of our nurses helps you I'm going to go over a few things with your father. Alex really hated this part. Because she wasn’t fully mobile on her own a nurse always had to help her change. It was embarrassing and another reason she was so glad to be leaving today. Alex changed as quickly as she could. Being unable to bend over all the way or move her arms very far didn’t help her little speed run but it was far faster then her first conscious attempt. The clothes that were picked out for her were actually really comfortable. A pair of black sweatpants, a grey T-shirt, and a pair of sneakers. Alex didn’t recognize any of the clothes but she attributed it to her faulty memory. 

She emerged from the bathroom being pushed in her wheelchair when she spotted another piece of clothing slung over Matthew’s arm. Her red jacket. It looked really clean. Alex laughed internally as that thought crossed her mind. She had never let go of the thing long enough for it to be thoroughly washed. Matthew smiled at her as the nurse wheeled her up to him.

“Ready to breakout?” Alex snickered at the exasperated look on the doctor’s face and the nurse trying to swallow a laugh.

“May I remind you Mister Young that breakouts are not necessary, and I sincerely hope that I never have you as a patient.” Alex laughed at that and the nurse lost her silent battle. Matthew grinned at Alex and handed her the jacket.

“Do you need any help putting it on” Alex shook her head and Matthew stepped behind her to grab the handles on her wheelchair. Alex held the jacket tightly in her lap. It felt really nice to have it again. “So who wants to race.” Alex snorted at the glare that appeared on the doctor’s face directed at her step-father.

“Mr. Young, I have said it before and I will say it again, you are a menace.” Matthew laughed behind her and they began their trek down to where her stepdad was parked. “I am happy to release you from our care Alex. Don’t push yourself too hard and you should heal quickly.” Alex nodded and felt pure and complete relief rush through her body as the front doors came into view. “Mr. Young please bring the wheelchair back inside after you are done with it. A nurse will take it from you. Have a great day Alex, I wish you a quick recovery.” The doctor walked off into the hospital and Alex relaxed into the chair as they moved towards the front doors.

“Doctors gone, which means I can do this.” Her stepdad popped the wheelchair onto its back tires as they walked out the front door performing a mini wheelie and causing Alex to release a yelp of surprise at the sudden movement. Matthew laughed and Alex smacked his arm. The summer heat in the air felt like being in the heart of a furnace. It was nicer than mind numbing cold but it was still way too hot. The car that they approached was not one Alex recognized. She felt there were going to be a lot of things she didn’t recognize in the coming months. Getting into the car was a unique challenge. Matthew ended up picking her up when she couldn’t figure out a way to maneuver herself in. Alex was grateful he had given her the chance to try, but sadly her physical therapy in the hospital had been focused on her legs, not her arms. Matthew picked Alex up from her wheelchair and set her inside the car on the edge of the window seat. Alex scooched into the car and took the offered seatbelt from her stepfather. Her inability to bend her arms past certain points was going to drive her insane. She was beginning to realize just how much her ability to function would be affected. Alex kept the frustration and disappointment from her face as her stepdad made sure she was situated before taking the wheelchair back inside. 

Alex sat by herself in the car and watched as Matthew went back inside. The silence compared to the continuous bustle of the hospital was hallowing. Alex took some shaky breaths in as she tried to move her thoughts away from just how similar it was to her time dimensional prison. She shivered and hugged her arms to her chest. Alex looked down at her herself and felt a twinge of uncomfort in her gut. She knew that she was very physically unwell, the doctors had left her no alternative other than admitting that. But seeing just how thin she was still made her uncomfortable. She was never an insanely strong person, she lost more arms wrestles than she ever won, but struggling to even lift her arms sometimes hurt deeply. She was always a more independent person and the inability to be as such frustrated her. But she could get through this, and she would.

Matthew came out a few minutes later and flashed her a grin as he got into the car. A few moments later they were off. Alex watched out the window as her home scrolled by. The trees, the houses, people. It was all so very familiar and yet completely new. Her memories were still a mess, but the majority of them consisted of those endless time loops. Memories of the world that was always around had faded. It was so nice to be able to see it all again. The drive went fairly quick as they only encountered a few red lights. No words were exchanged, Alex enjoying the scenery although with muted energy and Matthew too nervous to know where to begin. Alex felt some pity for her stepdad, but not much as she was still unaware of the details surrounding her disappearance. She knew that everyone had believed her to be dead, and that she had been gone for a while, she just didn’t know exactly.

When they pulled up to her old home Alex almost couldn’t breath. She remembered the violent emotions that she had as she sacrificed herself to the ghosts. Seeing home, the house she had spent her entire life in, it was the final straw that brought the reality crashing into her that she was free. The visit to the hospital, the way that Jonas and her mom looked at her like she was a dream. It was all very real.

Matthew helped Alex out of the car and into a wheelchair that they had purchased for her. The sky had slowly darkened as they drove. Alex let herself relax as her step father wheeled her up to the front door and inside. The inside was quiet but Alex felt like a heavy weight was lifted off her shoulders. No pitying looks from strangers, home cooked meals, and her own real bed, she was home. Alex’s stomach complained loudly and she winced. When she heard some poorly concealed laughter from behind her the grimace turned into a glare directed at her stepfather. Chuckles followed and Alex grumbled as he winked down at her. Matthew left Alex in the entry hallway and headed to the kitchen to get them both something to eat leaving Alex to look around. Everything looked pretty similar though it was hard to spot differences when you couldn’t remember anything. Matthew quickly returned with a few sandwiches and the two relaxed in the living room to eat their meal. Alex was loving a meal that wasn’t cheap hospital food and took her time to savor the taste. Her step father finished rather quickly.

“You know you don’t have to sit around to wait on me, you can go get anything done that you need too.” Alex felt guilty having noticed that her step father was just waiting in the room with her. A little annoyed at the idea that he didn’t believe that she could handle herself and a little grateful for the effort to help make her comfortable. She figured the least she could do is give the man an out for waiting on her. “I can manage on my own.” He looked saddened for a moment by what she said before flashing a grin at her and leaning forward on his knees.

“Don’t worry about it, I cashed in some saved up sick days so I don’t have to work for the next week.” Alex watched as he leaned back on the couch, she realized that the couch might be different than what she remembers. “So you know anything fun.” Alex looked around the living room before a console under the TV caught her attention. Might as well make this fun for the both of them right?

……………………

Jonas was exhausted. And annoyed. Really annoyed. Alex was getting out of the hospital today and he had to come to campus to deal with an administration mix-up. Jonas rubbed his eyes as he sat in the office. The college campus he was on was beautiful and normally he would enjoy having a few relaxing moments to enjoy the view. But right now he just wanted to get out of here. The past couple months had been less than pleasant. After Alex had been admitted to the hospital a flurry of motion had occurred. The police had contacted the four of them and almost interrogated them about how they found Alex. Apparently the assumption had occurred that Alex had escaped from a kidnapper. This assumption was drawn from a number of Alex’s injuries. Jonas had almost blown his top at the incessant questioning. Old friends of Alex’s from school had contacted him after the story made it to the local news. However, as quickly as the insanity had started it had disappeared. For which Jonas was very thankful.

The desk attendant called Jonas’ name and he stepped up to the counter to deal with the issues with his college account. Thankfully the issue was quickly resolved after about half an hour Jonas was able to leave. 

Jonas walked out of the administration office feeling relieved at how simple the problem had been to fix. Granted with the more immediate problem resolved, his thoughts drifted to what had been frustrating him for a while now. Simply put he did not know Alex. He knew the stories he had been told about her, but he didn’t know her. 

He had realized this when on one of the nights following her rescue Jonas had been kept awake by nightmares. Unable to fall asleep he had let his thoughts drift towards his step-sister. Laying there in the dark he had realized that he just didn’t know her. He didn’t know what she did when she was angry or scared. He didn’t know her favorite foods or places to go. He only knew what someone would discover in a single night while being hunted by maniac ghosts. Almost nothing. He frustrated and then embarrassed laying there in the dark. He realized that it was possibly the same for Alex. While Jonas had had time to mourn the sister he had never gotten to know. Alex was possessed, tortured, and subject to an alternate dimension. Jonas really hopped she wasn’t weirded out. It would make trying to get to know her harder. But she hadn’t pushed him away when he held her in the cave after they rescued her, so he took it as a good sign.

Jonas strolled along the sidewalks on the campus heading towards his jeep. It was the middle of summer and yet the sun was still hiding. Dark clouds dominated the afternoon sky. It was calming in a way. Nerves gripped Jonas as he drew closer to his vehicle. He really just wanted to be at home enjoying the day. And he wanted to spend the day with Alex. Not in awkward silence. He knew there would be at least one awkward conversation. He had yet to explain how long Alex had been missing and everything that had occurred. He was not looking forward to explaining it all. Jonas could see his car across the parking lot when he heard someone call his name. 

“Jonas?” He fought the urge to scream. He really just wanted to be at home right now. Jonas slowly turned around to see Mr. Philmore jogging up to him.

“Hey, Mr. Philmore.” Jonas began to cycle through every possible excuse he could think of. He really didn’t want to get into a long winded conversation right now. Sadly Jonas couldn’t voice one fast enough.

“It’s good to see you again, how have you been Jonas?” Jonas carefully contained the building frustration inside him. Between having to leave early this morning, being stuck in traffic for a few hours, bouncing between multiple locations on campus to resolve the issue and now being held up by his physics professor Jonas was ready to explode.

“Honestly Mr. Philmore it's been a very eventful past couple months.” Jonas really hoped that he would pick up on the hint and let him head home before traffic picked up again. However it seemed any luck Jonas might have, had abandoned him for the day.

“Anything I might be able to help with?” Jonas really wanted to scream. Mr. Philmore was an amazing professor and it was easy to tell he cared about his students. But Jonas did not want someone to be trying to help him right now.

“No, there is just a lot going on. Between trying to get ready for next semester and my sister I-” Mr. Philmore cut Jonas off clearly confused

“Your sister? I didn’t know you had a sister. Is she alright?” Jonas popped his knuckles as he tried to keep his cool. He really didn’t need to be snapping at anyone today.

“It’s a long story that I really don’t want to get into right now.” Jonas was silently praying that Mr. Philmore would head off or get called away by someone. Just something so he could leave.

“Alright I won't pry. May I ask though if you have given any thought to the research team?” Jonas paused at that, the frustration slowly bleeding away. He actually hadn’t given it any thought. It sounded like it could be a fun experience but Jonas just felt like a career in scientific research was for him. Still he figured he should spend at least some time thinking about it.

“I’m sorry i actually haven't. I’ve just been busy.” Mr. Philmore simply nodded before grinning at Jonas.

“Well, let me know when you’ve reached a decision. And if it helps I promise not to wear anything too terribly atrocious to the meetings.” Jonas chuckled as Mr. Philmore walked away. Jonas felt relieved that he hadn’t been caught in a long discussion with the professor. Jonas shook his head and hopped into his jeep. The clouds overhead had gotten darker since his stroll from the administration building. Jonas took a quick moment to pull a roof like covering over the top of the car before he started the engine. Jonas let out a deep sigh as he pulled out of the parking lot, it was going to be a long afternoon.

……………………..

Jonas pulled up to his house in the thundering rain. The storm had started suddenly with a wall of water hammering his tarp like roof and drowning out the sounds of jeep on the highway. Jonas reached into the glove compartment on his car’s dashboard and pulled out a remote allowing him to open the garage. He carefully pulled his jeep past his father’s car. The absence of another vehicle told him his mother was still at work. Jonas exited his vehicle and closed the garage behind him. The rain sounded like a firehose. Jonas entered the house and stepped into the kitchen. The smell was the first thing he noticed. It was really really strong and he silently hoped with all his might that his father had not made one of his mind melting dishes. The last time Jonas had tried one he hadn’t been able to get the taste of the fiery spices out of his mouth for nearly a week. It was not a fun experience. Ren had had no qualms teasing him about it though, until he had tried some and they both agreed never to speak of it again. The next thing he noticed was the sounds coming from the living room. He could hear upbeat music, the sound of engines, and his father’s laughter. He removed his shoes and slipped into the front hallway to peak at the living room. Inside his father sat on the couch leaned forward, arms on his knees, eyes glued to the screen. Sitting a little further down the couch a very distinct teal hair caught his attention. Her red hunting jacket sat off to her side on the couch and she had a wide grin plastered on her face as she was focusing on the game she and his father were playing. Jonas glanced over and saw the painful experience that was Mario kart on the tv screen. His father was doing well in second place but Alex was just barely in eleventh.

“Hey son, how did it go.” Jonas’s dad glanced over to him before looking back to the game. He and his father had always been competitive so it was no surprise to him that it was the same with Alex. 

“It went...okay. I had to bounce around campus for a little bit but I got it worked out.” Jonas' dad nodded and he quickly finished his final lap, Alex ended eleventh centimeters ahead of the other driver.

“I still think you cheated.” Alex dropped her controller to her side before turning to face Jonas and his dad. She looked, worn. She was wearing a grey t-shirt with black sweatpants. The clothes hung loosely off of her frame reminding Jonas just how concerned he was about her health. Bags were visible under her eyes and the medical bracelet was still attached to her wrist. She gave Jonas a weak smile.

“Me cheat? No. I would never.” His dad’s words were spoken with an air of innocence. Jonas laughed as Alex whacked his dad’s arm, his dad chuckled while rubbing his arm. Alex rolled her eyes at the both of them. “Say sport, want to play a few rounds with your sister while I cook dinner?” Jonas faltered for a moment before glancing at Alex she seemed excited or pleased with the idea so Jonas accepted.

“I am going to destroy you.” Alex had leaned over to poke Jonas in the side as she spoke giving him a mock glare. Jonas chuckled.

………………….

Matthew was in the kitchen preparing one of his spicier meals. He had told Alex about his cooking and she had bet that she would be able to eat anything he cooked without an issue. Not one to back down from a challenge Matthew had readily accepted. He wasn’t going all out with his cooking, his wife and son would never forgive him if he did. But he could go a bit spicier than normal. A few minutes passed and he listened to his son and daughter as they played...well step-daughter. Matthew had noticed that Alex wasn’t completely comfortable around him yet, and he understood why. He just was silently wishing that they could get to the point where she would comfortable calling him Dad. He had heard a lot about Alex from April. But now he had the chance to get to know her on his own.

“DID YOU JUST BLUE SHELL ME!?” Jonas’ voice sounded over the pouring rain outside. The sound of breathless cackling soon followed.

“Eat it sucker!” Matthew snorted as he tried to contain the laugh bubbling in his belly. Its was shaping up to be a wonderful night

………………….

Alex was silent, a glazed look had come over her features as she stared out into the darkened and silent house. It was late at night. Both of their parents had gone to bed long ago leaving the two siblings on their own. The night had been amazing. Their mom had come home and they had a wonderful night with dinner, jokes and a few games. Jonas had loathed running it by explaining the details of her disappearance. But she deserved to know.

Jonas fidgeted while he waited for Alex to say something, Anything. It was killing him as she stared off into the lightless house. Several, agonizing, minutes passed.

“Two years?” Her voice was quiet, strained and on the verge of tears. Jonas’ heart hurt. She looked so lost. All he could do was nod in response, not trusting his voice to work. He watched as Alex’s head dropped her eyes fixated on her hands which had begun to shake. Jonas was worried for his sister. Throughout the night he had noticed a lot of things. She had difficulty holding onto things, dropping utensils, controllers, and game pieces, multiple times. And she couldn’t move her arms above her shoulders or keep them elevated for long. Jonas carefully reached out and gently took Alex’s shaking hands. They were freezing compared to the summer heat of the day. “Two years.” Alex’s whole body began to shake as tears forced their way out of her eyes. Jonas quietly wrapped his arms around her, holding her as he leaned back into the couch. Alex pressed into his chest as she took gasps of breath between her tears.

Jonas felt a few tears of his own. He could guess at what was hurting her so much. All of her friends that she had grown up with were gone. They had all moved on with their lives. They had changed to become different people. Her home had morphed around her and everything she had known was no longer true. She was left in the past by everything and everyone. And to her she was still the 17 year old girl who had sacrificed her life for her friends. Jonas held Alex as she shook. His embarrassment and nerves from earlier in the day were completely forgotten. His sister needed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random thought, if i wrote more fanfics in other fandoms but just using Oxenfree characters would you guys burn me at the stake? cause i absolutely adore the Oxenfree characters and you will have to pry them out of the cold grasp of my rotting corpse.
> 
> P.S. for whatever reason AO3 gives me the red squiggles under the name Oxenfree and its driving me crazy.
> 
> posted 2/24/2021 (proof i survived the pandemic)


	9. (interlude) Squad movie night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everybody, so just in review we have about 3-4 chapters of interlude before we start again on the main storyline i have planned out. as for these interlude chapters they didn't quite turn out the way I wanted, these chapters have a little more purpose then just stalling for time i can use to write. This first chapter is my favorite of the three or so chapters i have. but anyways here is the first interlude chapter.

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Light burned at Alex’s eyes through her eyelids. She squeezed her eyes closed and turned over it face the wall, the memories of her dream fading like Ice cubes on a summer sidewalk. A shiver worked its way up her spine and Alex curled into herself under the heavy quilt she had over her. The pillow under her cheek was cool, and the quilt was warm. Alex let her eyes creek open. The white wall in front of her seemed to dimly glow with the sunlight. She let out a heavy sigh before sitting up. It had been a couple weeks since she came home from the hospital and she had found that sleep was very elusive. Alex leaned against the wall and observed her temporary room as her mother had put it. It was painted in a clean white not quite like a hospital, more warm and inviting. A simple dresser sat next to the twin sized bed that had been brought down from her room. Her wheelchair sat by the foot of her bed. A window in the far wall held a view of their backyard. No other decorations adorned the room. A peal of laughter echoed from the kitchen where the sounds of sizzling and scraping punctuated muffled conversation. Particles floated through the air visible in the beam of light coming through the window. Alex pulled the quilt up to her chin as she leaned against the wall, letting the warmth seep into her body slowly drowning the spindly chilled fingers that seemed to constantly grip her heart and spine. 

It was nice. It was so very nice. Sitting here Alex could almost imagine everything was fine, that,

..

everything...

..

Was okay.

That the Island never happened. That those Ghosts had never torn into her, ripped her apart. She could imagine that she had lived a semi-normal life with her mother remarrying. She could imagine that she and Jonas were able to bond naturally and not have been thrown together by their imprisonment in a life and death situation. The memories had slowly begun to come back and become clear. The waves of confusion and the sensation of drowning still persisted in her thoughts and mind but she was able to recall them with clarity. So many layers, so many tries, not one of them ever turned out fine. It was strange how easily she was able to recall an individual loop, currently she could remember about...69 loops? Each about six months long. It felt wrong to remember so much life but to not be old. She didn’t even feel old, just strained, pulled thin. 

Alex let out a heavy sigh. Sitting in her bed letting her thoughts drift wouldn’t help. It would probably just make things worse. Brushing the quilt aside Alex carefully scooted over to her wheelchair and lowered herself in. Her legs were still unable to hold her up without a lot of pain and some sort of handhold for her to cling to while she walked. She would do her exercises after breakfast. Alex wheeled herself over to the door and with only a little difficulty was able to swing it open. The sounds and smells from the kitchen bombarded her senses. She could smell eggs and some sort of meat and her stomach grumbled in response. Conspiring whispers froze as one of the two culprits stuck their head into the view of the hallway. Jonas’ hair was wildly sticking up and Alex smirked at his horrible bed hair. It was strange seeing him with teal hair. He obviously hadn’t dyed it in awhile evident by the large amount of brown hair was showing. Then again her hair probably didn’t look any better.

“You’re up earlier than usual?” Jonas’ questioning gaze held a flicker of concern as he stepped into the hallway and Alex rolled her eyes.

“Don’t remind me, I much rather would be in la-la land than looking at your ugly face.” A mock offended expression found purchase on Jonas’ face before turning into a sly grin. 

“Careful sis, I wouldn’t be talking so much smack when your roots are showing.”

“Oh like you’re any better, At least teal is a good color for me. You just look like you lost a fight with a slushy machine.” Jonas’ offended expression might have been real that time, but before he could say anything Matthew’s laughter filtered into the hallway from the kitchen.

“She’s right you know, Teal really ain't your color. I almost didn’t recognize you when you first dyed your hair.”

“Oh come on dad, I’m a lot better at it now then I was then.” Alex snickered at the annoyed tone in Jonas’ voice. He then wheeled back to her, “And just so you know I would totally beat a slushy machine in a fight. I would basically just be like fighting Ren.” Alex snorted at the end of Jonas’ little spiel.

“Well forgive me my honorable knight, If I ever find myself threatened by the monstrous inhabitants the slushy machines I shall be sure to call upon your aid.” Alex gave an exaggerated bow from her wheelchair before wheeling past Jonas and into the kitchen. She caught him rolling his eyes from the corner of her vision. Matthew was in the kitchen turning off the stove. Three plates of eggs, sausages, and a roll or two sat on the counter. Matthew was busy piling a fourth serving of the meal into a plastic container.

“Honey, have you seen my keys?” Alex looked over her shoulder as her mom came down the stairs. She was wearing a simple striped dress and had her hair up in a bun. Apparently she had gotten some big promotion at work a year or so ago. Because of this she often had to spend many early mornings at work. Matthew worked from home in his office and Jonas was attending Camena college. Thankfully it was summer break otherwise Alex might have lost her mind sitting in the house all alone every day. Alex snickered as a morbid joke about not being able to lose her mind since she had in fact already done so. Friggin ghosts.

“They’re right here on the counter with your breakfast dear.” Matthew held up the offending item along with the plastic container. “Have a good day at work.” Her mom walked over and gave Matthew a kiss while taking the items from him.

“Thank you.” she turned around to face Jonas and herself. “Now you two be good. Try not to burn the house down while I’m gone.”

“Oh ye of little faith, I’m right here you know.” Alex’s mom turned back around to face Matthew.

“Yes I know, but you’re more likely to join them in whatever scheme they cook up instead of stop them, so shush.” Matthew grinned behind her mom’s back and made a face at the two of them. Alex cracked a grin while her mom rolled her eyes. “Alright I have to go now.” she gave Jonas a quick hug and gave Alex a tight squeeze. It was a bit longer than the hug she gave Jonas but Alex didn’t think she could blame her mom for being a little clingy. April broke off the hug and quickly sped out the door and off to work. The three remaining family members coasted over to the kitchen table to eat their own breakfast. Silence reigned at the table for a few minutes.

“So what are you two up to today.” Alex blinked at the question as she tried to recall. There was a though at the edge of her mind, but she couldn’t quite recall it. 

“Today’s the uh.. Movie night with Ren and all them.” Jonas thankfully answered for her and her scattered mind. Then she registered what he said.

“Ugh, yes finally.” Alex was very excited to see her friends again. And actually be able to interact with them as well, not just be pulled around like a zombie.

“Finally? Getting tired of me already sis?” Alex glared at Jonas sitting next to her, he was grinning from ear to ear.

“Of you? Nooooo, I could never. You’re just so interesting” The sarcasm was almost a physical substance. Jonas rolled his eyes at her with a grin and Alex couldn’t stop a grin from appearing on her own face as well. It was strange how easily they had fallen into sibling bickering. Alex usually won all of their arguments having experience with an older brother. But it was something she found greatly enjoying, not winning that is, just having an older brother again. She couldn’t and refused to ever forget or replace Michael. But Jonas was her brother now too. She wouldn’t trade it for the world.

“Guess that makes two of us.” Alex rolled her eyes. She takes it back, she hates having another brother.

………..

Alex was spinning in half circles in her wheelchair when the first knock sounded on the door. It had been a relaxed day she and Jonas had passed the day mainly doing their own things. They had messed around a little on the gaming console on the TV but they had gotten bored quickly. Alex had decided to spend a good amount of time working on her exercises, she missed being able to walk and run. Her legs and arms were really sore and Alex was beginning to think she may have pushed a little too hard today. She was very grateful for the distraction of her friends.

Jonas answered the door to allow Ren and Nona into the house.

“Lets get this party started!” Ren was almost bouncing as he walked into the hallway, Nona was close behind him rolling her eyes and carrying a couple bags. Ren was wearing a greyish-white t-shirt with a pair of sweat pants. Nona had her dark hair up in a bun with jeans, a yellow t-shirt and a grey jacket. They looked, grown up. Alex greeting caught in her throat as she looked at her friends. They just seemed so grown up.

“We still have to wait for Clarissa, Ren” She then turned to Jonas. “We brought some snacks, Chips, some salsa, and Marshmallows.” the three walked back into the dining room with Alex and Nona set the bags on the counter. She then walked over and leaned down to give Alex a hug. Alex accepted the hug and tried to allow the strange revelation to fade from her mind. It worked. Slightly. “How are you doing Alex.”

Alex hesitated for a moment. She felt decent. Her legs were sore and she probably looked terrible. “I feel alright, a little tired but good.” Nona smiled at her and went to help Jonas and Ren as they started to bicker over which movie they wanted to watch. Alex watched the squabbling and nearly laughed. Jonas and Ren were acting like they had known each other for years...which they have. The strange feelings came back and Alex realized that she felt out of place, afraid almost. Lost. Alex sat there watching the friendly argument and just felt wistful. She would give anything to fall into something like that again. Ren and Nona had visited her a few times in the hospital but they were always overly gentle with her, like she was made out of glass. She watched as Jonas put Ren into a headlock and smiled. Trying to stuff her feelings of loss and displacement far down where she couldn’t find them.

Another knock sounded from the door and Alex quickly called out to the three troublemakers. “I’ll get it! Don’t break anything.”

“Don’t worry Alex Jonas won’t know what hit him.” Alex rolled her eyes at Ren’s comment. At least some things were still the same.

She wheeled down the hallway and swung open the door. Clarissa was standing there with 3 pizza boxes in her hands and her signature frustrated and bored expression across her face. Her expression softened slightly when she saw Alex but not by much. Alex found that she wouldn't have it any other way.

“How have you been?” Clarissa asked the question with a sense of superiority and Alex tried not to smile. Clarissa had visited her the most in the hospital, even more than Jonas. She had brought a few card games and had even just come to talk a few times. She was always wearing that same expression she had now but never left early. Even if they just sat there in silence. Alex was immensely grateful for the sense of normalcy she brought.

“I’ve been alright, the exercises are exhausting but I’m getting through it.” the corner of Clarissa’s mouth flicked upward for a moment before they headed back towards the kitchen where Jonas was almost sitting on top of Ren as he struggled to fight his way out.

“Alex,”  _ WHEEZE  _ “save me.” Alex snorted at Nona’s expression.

“So, have we decided on a movie?”

“We can,”  _ WHEEZE  _ “pick a”  _ WHEEZE  _ “movie,”  _ WHEEZE  _ “later.” Jonas seemingly took pity on Ren at that moment and allowed him to get up off the floor. “Give me a moment.” Ren took a few deep breaths as Nona looked toward her and Clarissa, her expression pleading for aid. “Jeez Jonas, you need to go on a diet man.”

“MOVING ON!” Nona nearly shouted over Jonas’ retort. “Let's eat first and then watch the movie.” Clarissa deposited the pizza boxes onto the table and everyone moved towards the table, Jonas and Ren shoving each other on their way over. “Hey Jonas where’s your dad?”

“He’s out with mom for a date night, not sure exactly what they are doing.” Ren went to say something but Nona smacked him before he could and with a pointed glare forced him into submission.

“Wasn’t going to say anything dumb.” Ren whispered into his cup. Nona smacked him. And even Clarissa smirked. A little.

Dinner went well. The five of them sat around the table enjoying each other’s company. The meandering conversation soon landed on stupid stunts with Ren and Jonas trying to one up each other. Nona then pointed out that they had done plenty of stupid things together while she and Clarissa were out of town. Ren soon had the group listening intently as he recounted a dare gone wrong. Those same feelings of displacement and nostalgia from earlier whispered at the back of Alex’s mind and she did her best to ignore them. During the climax of Ren’s story Alex went to take a sip of her drink when Ren smacked the table with his knee, Alex jerked in surprise causing pain to shoot up her arm and into her hand. She fumbled desperately trying to keep the cup up right before a large portion of the drink sloshed over the rim and onto Alex’s shirt. Alex let out a sigh as Ren shouted.

“Ahh!? Frig! Sorry Alex, That’s my bad.” Alex waved him off carefully setting the now mostly empty cup back onto the table.

“You’re fine, it's not your fault. My limbs still aren’t working quite right.” Frustration boiled inside her gut and she fought desperately to keep it from showing in her voice or face. She wasn’t angry at Ren or anyone. She was just angry with herself, with the fact that her limbs refused to work right. She was frustrated at the fact that she now had to go change her shirt. A task that would take her at least ten minutes. Alex wheeled away from the table and towards her room. She wormed her way past the door. It closed with a soft click and she went over to her dresser. Alex lifted herself onto the edge of her bed, her arms screaming in protest. She definitely went too hard with the therapy exercises. With a grimace on her face Alex began the wrestle to pull her shirt off. Only a few moments later a soft knock came from her bedroom door. Alex froze but before she could say anything. Clarissa slipped into the room, she leaned against the wall and pulled out her phone. Silently scrolling through something. Alex spared her a glance for a few moments before returning to wrestle with her clothes. A minute or two passed and Alex was still struggling with her shirt. Frustration, anger, embarrassment coursed through her lighting up her face. A hand gently laid itself on her shoulder and Alex glanced up to see Clarissa with one eyebrow raised in questioning. Alex sighed and nodded before letting Clarissa help her pull the shirt off. Clarissa took the wet shirt and set it on top of the dresser. Without a word she began to look through her dresser drawers for a shirt. Alex let the bitter emotions boil down before she trusted herself to speak.

“We need to go shopping, whoever bought these clothes has horrendous taste.” Alex couldn't help but smirk and nearly laugh at Clarissa’s offended and slightly horrified tone. And a moment later all the swirling emotions just washed out leaving her exhausted. She leaned back and watched Clarissa going through her shirts disgust flighting across her face at nearly everyone she pulled out.

“I’m sorry.” Clarissa paused for a moment but didn’t say anything before returning to look through the clothes. Alex glanced down at her hands. “I’m sorry that you have to help with this, you know when we a-” a sting flared on Alex’s forehead and her head shot up to Clarissa who was leaning over her with her hand still head up to her head where she had just flicked her. “Did you just flick me?”

“Yes, yes I did.” Clarissa stared her down a moment longer and Alex had no idea how she was supposed to respond. When no words came out Clarissa returned to rummaging through her shirts. Alex stayed silent, lost in thought while Clarissa found a shirt that she deemed acceptable. “This one isn’t as terrible as the others, we still need to go shopping though.” Alex nodded and leaned away from the wall. Clarissa sat down on the bed beside her and helped her to put on the shirt. Alex went to scoot back to her chair but Clarissa stopped her with a hand on her shoulder. Clarissa then leaned up against the wall next to Alex and took her hand. They sat like that for a minute, faint moonlight filtered in through the window. “Alex, when are you going to learn that it's okay to ask for help?” Alex tried to speak but no words came out. “Believe it or not Alex, we care about you. After what you went through,  **none** of us blame you for struggling.” a few moments passed before Clarissa spoke again. “Let us help you Alex.” Alex let out a wet laugh and Clarissa pulled her into a hug tucking Alex’s head under her chin. It was surprisingly gentle. Alex let herself enjoy the hug for a minute or two.

“Okay.” a slight squeeze was the only response that Alex received. A thought then a smirk grew in Alex. “So, when did you get so soft? You like a mother hen or something.” A loud groan sounded from above her and Alex sat up laughing wiping tear streaks from her face.

“Don’t even get me started, I think it started when Ren tried to eat a cafeteria fork on a dare.” Alex laughed loud and clear, Clarissa’s own quiet chuckle accompanied her.

……….

The rest of the night's festivities passed fairly quickly. But the night had one more sick surprise in store. The movie was playing, everyone was bundled up on the couch under a vast variety of blankets. The movie they were watching was some mystery movie that Alex was too tired to follow the plot of. She vaguely heard Ren making predictions and Nona smacking him. She leaned against Jonas’s side. The movie and the sounds of the night were slowly fading until a burst of radio static tore through the atmosphere, then voices between the spikes of static and Alex’s heart stopped. Memories of dark, cold spaces; and red, dead eyes; the sensation of tearing flesh and drowning under miles of shadow seized Alex’s mind. Fingers of death climbed up her spine and gripped her lungs bringing a freezing cold. Alex didn’t feel herself begin to shake or register when the sounds of the movie cut off. Unable to breath, Alex was lost to a hundred thousand time streams and the pain they brought. Someone pulled her into their side and she burrowed into it trying to escape the barbed hooks of her memories. The sounds of a movie quickly picked up again and Alex looked up through her tear filled eyes to see an old comedy playing. She glanced up to her left to Jonas with his arms around her, holding her tight and not saying a word. She glanced around him to see Ren and Nona, both holding each other with troubled expressions slowly bleeding away as they let themselves be distracted by the frankly horrible comedy they were watching. No one gave her strange looks or asked if she was okay, Jonas just held her. Fresh tears of relief and gratitude rolled down her cheeks. Alex looked to her right and saw Clarissa looking at her. Clarissa reached out and laid a gentle hand against her back. Her expression seemed to communicate two years of pain, loss, and a battle then never really ended for them. Without a single word Clarissa communicated exactly what Alex needed to hear.

_ We’re all still a little broken....but we got better, and so can you.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for Reading, I hope you are enjoying the story!!
> 
> posted 3/8/2021


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